Capítulo Ocho: Jane Austen and World Domination Go Hand In Hand
NB: Some references you might not be familiar with:
Emma (n): Novel, by Jane Austen, about the perils of misconstrued romance. Before she began the novel, Austen wrote, “I am going to take a heroine who no one but myself will much like”. Naturally, everyone loves Emma Woodhouse, the heroine. She is described as ‘handsome, clever and rich.’ However, she’s also spoilt, greatly overestimates her own matchmaking abilities and is blind to the dangers of meddling in other people's lives. Nice girl.
Other characters in Emma include Harriet Smith, Emma’s friend whom she ‘takes under her wing’, Jane Fairfax, a random orphan, and George Knightley, who starts off as Emma’s family friend but is (spoiler alert, if any of you plan on reading Austen’s work) eventually her love interest.
Emma Watson (n): English actress best known for playing Hermione Granger in the Harry Potter film franchise. One of M’s girl crushes.
Emma (n): Liz’s real name. Oops, we gave it away. Oops.
Jane Eyre (n): Novel by Charlotte Bronte. Heroine is called Jane Eyre. Well done Bronte, for choosing an imaginative title.
The Pit (n): Nickname for the playground in M, J and P’s school.
Tu eres constipada? (phr.): Spanish for Do you have a cold? P’s little inside joke, however. She uses it whenever she wants to imply that someone is constipated.
Be Elegant. Be Constipada.
S: We are meeting a new verb, today, chicas!
M: Why is she always under the illusion that we can meet verbs?! They’re words. You can’t meet them.
J: Oh, shut up.
M: But-
J: Ssh.
S: Yes, we are meeting-
M: Meeting.
S: The verb poder! Can anyone tell me what poder means?
Awkward silence as no one is willing to offer up an answer.
M: rolls eyes ‘To be able to’.
S: pleased Muy bien, to be able to! So, we’re going to be fancy. We shall say Se puede...
M: One can...?
S: Precisely! Se puede ir a la playa !
Random Student : One can go to the beach ?
S: Excelente!
M: What if I wanted to say One can play the piano?
S: Se puede…what’s the verb to play for instruments?
Random Student: Tocar!
M: Isn’t that to touch?
S: Yes, darling, but you say tocar when you’re playing the piano.
YOU ARE READING
Worst Comebacks In History
HumorThe misadventures of three intelligent teenagers who are almost always bored. In their Spanish lessons, anyway.
