2 a.m
I can't stop. Thoughts. Thoughts constantly flowing through my head. It's happening again. I can't just give up on all this time. 2 months. It feels like forever. I don't think i could take this pain anymore. I look at the pills by my bedside. I look at my drawer full of blades. I grab my phone and write to my friend miles away.
Hello love xx
It's me again... for the very last time. I know you will try to stop me but by the time you are reading this message i'll already be gone. Remember that time I drank bleach and took those pills? I wished so badly that it would've worked. It's all because of you that I'm still here. I'm sorry that I can't go on anymore. I've tried to stay strong for you but i've become just a walking cage of anxitey, stress, depression. My face is expressionless. You are the only one who cared. My mom she is gone still. When I go through with this she won't care. My sister is just going to laugh. I don't have anything to live for anymore. I wanted to say thank you for dealing with me. Now that i'm gone you won't have to. My constant coming to you telling you my problems was a nuisance. Your burdens now will be lifted. I'm sorry. I love you and I always will. Don't worry about me kiddo. Goodbye.
I grabbed the pills. My hands were shaking.
