Broken (Nathan Sykes fanfic)

Chapter 61

A/N: massive thank you to everyone for reading! Can't believe Broken has over 441K reads! That is just amazing! So as you know I have posted a new fanfic called Victim, it's on my profile so if you want, go check it out:) hope you guys like it! Now moving on with the drama... enjoy you beautiful people! So sorry that I haven't updated for ages! Hope you like this!

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Everything just fell down, everything I had built up was crumbling around me. I couldn't take it anymore. Nothing was right. He can't be. He just can't be dead. It's not possible. He was fine yesterday, right?

I just sat there. I didn't move. I couldn't move. Everything was slowing down around me. My dad can't be dead, he just can't be. He had so much left to do, he had to see me graduate University, then get married and walk me down the isle. It's too soon for him to be dead, and Nathan knew. Nathan knew that something was wrong but he didn't tell me. We are meant to be in a relationship but he is keeping things like this from me? What else has he decided not to tell me?

I lifted my hand up touched my neck, I have given everything to Nathan and he repays me by keeping this from me. He has already ruined the relationship now he wants to ruin it just a little bit more. I can't take it. Not anymore. I'm done with all the lies and everything he has ever said to me or done. I keep giving him chances and he just doesn't listen, he doesn't seem to take any notice of the damage he is actually causing.

It hurts so much because every time I take him back, after everything, because I love him. This time I can't, it's gone too far.

A constant knocking on the door made everything seem to go at normal pace once again, "Lexi open the door please," Nathan pleaded.

I was expecting anger to flow through my but nothing. I felt nothing.

"Alexis please. Let me in, don't block me out." Nathan carried on and returned to his constant knocking.

Once more nothing flew through me, I couldn't feel anything. No anger. No hatred. No love. I felt numb to the world.

"You need me, let me in Lexi. Don't do this to yourself, don't forget everything that's happening otherwise you won't heal. I can help you through this, I promise." Nathan said and the knocking just stopped.

I leaned back against the door and closed my eyes, "talk to me please," Nathan mumbled and I heard someone slid down against the door.

"I'm tired," I choked out.

Nathan gave a breathy laugh, "yeah me too, babe. Every dark day you have there will always be a rainbow to come through."

"Why are you saying that?" I asked as I gave a small yawn.

"Because today is your dark day. Soon there will be a rainbow, it means you will get through this. I can't promise how long it will take but you can get through anything if you put your mind to it." Nathan answered back.

I gave a sarcastic laugh, "you don't know that for sure."

"I do. I know what you are going through Lexi. I promise it will get better." Nathan mumbled.

"I don't care." I retorted as I opened my eyes once again feeling my body heat up.

"Don't say that," Nathan answered as I stood up and felt my legs wobble so I leaned against the door to keep my support. I took a deep breath before turning around and opened the door, Nathan looked up from where he were sat on the floor. He stood up quietly and looked at me and went to hug me but I moved out of his way.

"Where's Jo?" I asked him ignoring his regretting gaze.

"Downstairs," he mumbled.

I moved pass him and made my way towards the stairs. I felt my breathing become shallow as tears began to fill my eyes then I blinked them away with every step I took. When I reached the bottom the tears had cleared. I walked into the living room and saw Jo asleep on the couch with his cartoons playing. I went over to a chair and picked up the blanket before gently laying it over Jo and looked at his flushed tear stained cheeks. Instantly I felt everything fall once again before I shook my head, I need to be strong. No crying.

I made my way into the kitchen where Kelsey and Tom were. Kelsey looked up and gave me a weak smile as I went over to the drawers, "hey," Tom said quietly.

I closed the drawer and looked through the other one, "Lexi please talk to us," Kelsey pleaded, "Nathan has she spoken to you?"

I slammed that drawer closed before going through the final one and pulled everything out and threw it all onto the floor, "Lexi what are you doing?" Kelsey asked.

Someone's hand took mine, I looked up and saw Nathan looking down at me before he picked something out the drawer and threw it onto the floor. He let go of my hand and went to the drawer beside me and began taking things out of it and throwing it onto the floor. I just watched him until he stopped and looked at me with a raised eyebrow.

"What are they doing, Tom?" Kelsey asked.

"Let's leave them for a bit," Tom mumbled as I began taking things and throwing it onto the floor seeing the two of them leave the kitchen.

I got a stack of letters and threw them up into the air and felt them fall around us when Nathan grabbed my arm and pulled me close to him then pressed his lips against mine. I felt my lips move against his before I shook my head and then pulled away, "no." I muttered and moved away from him. I looked through the drawer and found the address book and took it then went over to the table and sat down.

"What do you mean, no?" Nathan asked as he followed me.

I opened the book and looked through the names, "talk to me." He pressed.

I looked at the A contacts and picked out the families and used the pen that was in the book and made a star next to the names, "what are you doing?" He questioned and took a seat beside me.

I read through the names making a star next to the ones that were going to be needed, "planning the funeral." I muttered.

Nathan tensed up slightly, "don't you think it's too soon to be planning it?"

"The quicker it's done then I can move on quickly." I answered.

Nathan groaned, "fuck sake Lexi. Look at me!"

I looked up and said nothing, "you are in shock. You have just found out that your dad is dead."

"I'm fine." I answered.

Nathan scoffed, "okay then say it. Say to me that your dad is dad. Come on Lexi, if you are really fine then you would say that your dad is dead."

I just shook my head, "shut up!" I shouted and clenched my fists before looking down at the address book seeing all the names blue together as tears filled my eyes.

"You can't say it because you are not fine. You can't plan this funeral, not yet." Nathan murmured.

I looked up and glared at him, "you knew! You knew what happened! When did you find out then Nathan?"

"That's not important right now." He muttered and ran a hand through his hair.

I rolled my eyes, "isn't it? Funny how my supposed 'boyfriend' knew that my dad was dead before I did! So tell me, when did you find out?"

Nathan stood up causing the chair to fall to the floor, "last night. I found out last night, when your phone was going off."

"You said it wasn't important." I said quietly

"I didn't want to ruin your night," he started but I shook my head.

"No. My dad died and you were too selfish to tell me. You didn't want me to find out. I would say that I'm surprised but I'm not. Not anymore. You know what Nathan, we are done. For good." I said shakily.

Nathan turned around and looked at me, "you don't mean that."

"I do. We are over Nathan. I never want to see you again, just get out. Get out of my house, and get out of my life." I snapped.

Nathan opened his mouth to say something but then closed it, he looked at me one last time before going to walk out the kitchen. I looked down at the address book and carried on staring the names.

"I'm... I'm sorry." Then he left.

I felt my shoulders begin to shake as the tears filled my eyes once again and then they began to fall down my cheeks. I folded my arms onto the table and leaned my head on them and cried.

Someone began to make soothing circles on my back, "shh," I heard Kelsey whisper, "I'm here. It's going to be okay."

"It's not," I cried, "everyone I love is going."

"I promise that I am going to try and help you," Kelsey whispered.

I nodded my head and looked up before hugging Kelsey and cried into her shoulder.

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A/N: one of the shortest chapters I have ever written in my life. Moving on, now Victim is my new fanfic, I do suggest you read it as it can turn out quite interesting and something you may not expect. Also it may help for a certain fanfic that will be ending soon. Anyways, thank you all for reading! Hope you liked this kind of filler chapter! I still haven't decided on a set amount for when this will end. I hope you liked it anyway! please comment and vote! thank you!