Permanently yours.

*Vic’s POV*

“Vic, dude! Wake up. We’ll leave in 20 minutes!” I heard Mike yell as he ran to the room.  Warped tour was starting today. I got up, took a shower and put on some clothes.

 “All ready?” I asked.  “Yeah, Tony texted that he’d be here in few.” Jamie said as we got into the bus. After five minutes Tony arrived and we were ready to go. “Hey guys, I heard that sleeping with sirens is coming too after all!” Tony yelled the second he got in. We thought they weren’t coming after some bad drama Kellin was having at home. “Really? Why haven’t Kellin told me anything...” I said. I was a little bit pissed, we were really close. “Well, Justin told me, so maybe Kellin’s still having hard time and just forgot.” Tony smiled at me. “I guess so then.” I smiled back. It still felt weird that he didn’t tell me...

   *few hours later*

“Vic! You’re phone keeps buzzing, can you please get it.” Jamie yelled 

*Hey! Are you guys stopping at the next gas station? Miss you. –Kellin* I read the text. I asked the guys if we were stopping and they told me we were.

*Yes, we are. See you there?* I send back.

*Sure thing!* He soon answered.

I hopped out of the bus as soon as it stopped. Soon I saw Kellin just few steps away.

*Kellin’s POV*

I stepped out of the bus. The other busses weren’t there yet. I wandered around for a while and  saw the pierce the veil bus pulls out to the station. Finally. I’ve missed these guys. Especially Vic.

“Hey!” I said and hugged him as soon as he was there. I always thought that he was the most handsome man on earth and that is one thing that hasn’t changed, even thought a lot has. 

“Hey! I missed you man.” He smiled at me.

“Missed you too! How’s life?” I asked.

“Mine’s going just like before. But I heard that yours isn’t?” He said with questioning look on his face.

“Yeah, well I broke up with Katelynne. But can we talk more later when we can be alone?” Why did I ask that? I’m just going to end up lying. I can’t tell him the real reasons.

“Sure thing.” He smiled back at me and soon the rest of the bands where there and we said our hi’s and got some food and soon were off to the road again.

*Vic’s POV*

So he really did broke up with Katelynne. I wonder why, I thought they were doing perfect, even planning for having a baby.

I was feeling like shit. I loved that boy. I loved Kellin. I never told anyone of course but right now it was just much harder to keep it in as I knew that kellin isn’t in a relationship. But he isn’t gay or bi or in any other way interested in men. And neither am I, not in anyone else’s eyes part from my own.

I was sitting on mu bunk, writing lyrics. Just putting everything on paper, everything that I felt for him. Not by his name of course, no one else had to know who it was about. This song was just for me.

“Come on Vic! You’ve been in your punk all night. Come play fifa with us!” Jamie asked, pushing the curtain aside. “Thanks, but I’ll just stay here. I’m really tired.” There’s the lie I tell over and over again. “Vic. Dude. You’re my best friend. And the Vic I know isn’t always tired and sitting in his bunk all by himself on the first day of tour. Tell me, what’s going on in the little head of yours?” Jamie asked. He was my best friend. I felt bad for lying to him but I couldn’t tell the truth either. Or could I? “Jamie. Really, I’m not coming to play right now so you can go.” I said. I just couldn’t bring myself to lie him anymore. “Well if that is the case then I’m staying here with you until you tell me.” He said and got to the punk next to mine. I didn’t say anything. “I really don’t want the tour going by with you being all weird.” He said. He really looked worried. “It’s just... Kellin.” I slipped. Great Vic, just great. How am I going to cover this up? “Kellin? What about him? It’s not your problem that he and Katelynne broke up. Yes, I get it, you are best friends but you still shouldn’t be this sad.” He said. Okay, here we go. It’s now or never, I tell myself. “That’s the thing. I’m not sad.” I say so quietly that I’m surprised if he heard anything. “What? Sorry, I’m a bit lost now. So the reason you’re sad is Kellin but you’re happy that he and Katelynne broke up?” He asked with confusion. “Well I’m not happy but yes.” I say now with full voice. I already said it so there is no reason to pull back anymore. It’s either he hates me for it or will support me. I hope to god it’s the second one. “So what could possibly be making you sad about Kellin if it’s not that? You’re sad that he didn’t tell you about it sooner?” Jamie keeps guessing. How the hell am I going to tell him? “No. It’s just that…” Still can’t get the words out of my mouth. Jamie keeps quiet. He’s looking at me with his eyes telling me it’s okay to tell him anything. “Jamie… I love Kellin.” I say and burst into tears. “Wow. Wasn’t expecting that. But Vic, no need to cry. I’m not judging you. You’re still my best friend.” He says and comes to hug me. What? He’s not disgusted that I like another guy? He’s okay with it?

 “Guys. What’s taking so long?” Mike comes out from the back room of the bus. God, I forgot the others were here. Luckily there’s a door between us and them was closed and the TV was on so they couldn’t hear us. “Not now Mike.” Jamie said. “Vic? Are you okay?” Mike asked. “Yes, just leave me.” I said. I felt bad but one person a night is enough for me. “I’m your brother. I want to know if something’s wrong!” He yelled. “Mike, everything is fine. But right now you need to give Vic the space he wants.” I hear Jamie tell to Mike as he leads him out of the room. “Want to be alone?” Jamie asks me. “Yeah. Thanks. And please do not tell the boys.” I say. “No need to thank me. I’m just glad to know that you are at least mostly fine. And I won’t but you should tell them soon. At least to Mike, he is your brother.” He says and smiles. “I will. Just not tonight. I’ll go to sleep now.” I smile back.

I’m so happy about how this went. I’m glad that now Jamie knows.