My Own Personal Superhero

Chap. 1: December 20th 2013

     Lets go back to the beginning. And frankly, I am talking the very beginning of what came to be. When the air was crisp, and the trees were bare. I can remember it like it was yesterday. It was my birthday only a few days before then. I used to get lectured for being naive and unaware what wanting someone truly meant. It wasn't about what someone gave you, it was how they gave themselves to you. I didn't get that at first. As a young version of myself, I was okay with getting treated like shit. I was always told by my parents; "When you're older, you will understand." Somehow, by December 20th 2013, I understood everything. It all seemed clear to me. I can say that with full confidence because despite how young I was, I matured 10 times faster than those around me. Hell, I felt more mature than my mom's boyfriend at the time. His name was Rob. I knew what I felt was real and valid.
Anyways... on with the story.

     New Year's was approaching. The big 2014. So my mother, Amy and her boyfriend Rob hosted a little party. A gathering. I was so excited to be around people yet was... shy and scared. While, my little sister Violet was attached to my hip. They arrived all together. These 3 or, about 4 guys were just there to have fun. One of them was quite sarcastic right off the bat, his name was Mike. There was this guy going into the army named Will, at least that's what he was planning to do. Another guy, Todd was a total goofball, he never failed to make me laugh because he was on the floor 50% of the time.

But ... there was one more. One more guy that is so much more than "just a guy" to me now in present time 2017. I remember exactly what he was wearing. It was a dark blue hoodie and he had a nerdy shirt on underneath. He had such a handsome face that was completely unforgettable. He entered the room I was in and I felt my heart beat so fast I didn't know exactly what to do and why it was so terrifying. He smiled and said, "Hi, I'm Kyle." And I lost all sense of anything. I remember that moment, only that moment...so clearly only because I couldn't say anything to this handsome nerdy man for so many reasons. I wanted to know Kyle, and I didn't even know myself yet. It took 3 years to build up the reality, the sense, and the love I had for myself to open up to him after all of those years of his handsome face slipping right through my fingers. I remember standing in this small kitchen, with his hand out towards the light to show me his DC tattoo on his wrist. And I couldnt believe there was a person on this planet who could understand me, mentally and nerdily (not a word). I never knew I would have this man in my grasp about 1200 days later. Kyle is a different type of man. You find them about 2% of the time if you're fortunate. So how did I get so lucky? How did I end up with an amazing, caring, handsome, generous older guy who didn't bullshit me ever even in the beginning. I think everyone that night knew I was awestruck that I found someone like me. Rob and my mother told me to stay away because I was gonna get Kyle in trouble and he was 'too old for me'. Yeah ha. Thats a funny story honestly. He's perfect for the quirky unique girl I am. At least... i think so. And I think thats all that matters.

Kyle had this aura about him no other guy had to me. His laugh was so contagious, and his smile gave me butterflies all up and down my body. I could listen to him talk for hours. I can. I still do. I don't ever plan on not listening to him. He matters more than anyone ever has. His looks were definitely one thing because he was so handsome and it took me by surprise that he'd even pay attention to a little girl like me. And now I don't know how he manages to. Yet.. his personality. Who Kyle truly was, took me by storm. It wasn't just his captivating eyes that drew me in, but it was his pure sense of humanity and authenticity made me deeply crave to know more about him.

But there is no way to describe that night. No combination of every English word in the dictionary could sum up what Kyle made me feel, what Kyle does for me now. So even if I was 15, young as ever, I could feel myself falling for him. But I really never knew this could be real. That all my fantasies became my reality. Yes, i get it. It seems off. Like no way. There's no way you landed a man like that.

And I am practically in the same boat. I still cannot believe Kyle is with me. I still can't believe he's put in over a thousand hours being my boyfriend, talking to me, and making me feel wanted. Because ever since December 2013, I wanted him. And I wish sometimes I was lying. That I wish I could pretend he was just a guy to me I met at a New Years party. But no. Kyle was a blessing in disguise. He was so influential to mold me who I am today. From a distance, I saw he gave zero fucks and was himself always. And It made me embrace the nerd in me.
He will always have my heart. He will always be the one man I wanted and waited to try and taste. Which... in fact I have and he is delicious. No not his dick. Perverts... sheesh. I meant his mind. I feel as if he underestimates who he is sometimes. Kyle is so smart and interesting. There may be moments where I need to tackle him but thats for the good of the order. He deserves it most of the time but god. He gets me.
He understands me so god damn well. Everything I do, he knows what to say and he's extremely honest.

I wouldn't trade him for the world. Ever. He's good for me. And I believe I am good for him. It might seem too 'Romeo & Juliet' but I'm seriously gonna fight for him. No matter what it takes. Because everything happens for a reason and it isn't coincidence that decided to put my 500% into the both of us. I'm willing to take the time to build. But he's saved me from multiple accounts of danger and reality. He's truly my superhero.
And I hope to god he knows that.

Because anxiety struck about 3 months after the initial start of Kyle and I. And it wasnt pretty.