I always wanted to be with her and spend every minute of the day. I never felt sad or down because of her. Her name on the chat list is the one that emphasizes to my eyes the most. Her "GOOD MORNING" really wakes me up with a happy, healthy smile on my face.
It is always a pleasure entertaining her.. even if I don't have much to say, I never wanted to end our conversation. Due to lack of words, I sometimes asked her "So.. anong favorite number mo sa electric fan?" She doesn't get what I meant so she shares it to her friends and started to get the joke and laughed at my ka-corny-han.
I always wanted to make her laugh, because every time she laughs.. I always see a princess laughing in front of me as her face is shining, and everything I see around her is nothing but blurred . Days have passed, I asked her if I can court on her and she said "yes" but she needs time for that.. So I waited for her because I like her so much.
I like her because she was perfect for me, even with her flaws. I like her because she's kind and gorgeous even on her maldita and masungit days. I like her because I knew I would love her.
I told her that I hope she won't get tired of my attitude. I told her that whatever would happen, I would and will always be right here for her wether she's in a good or bad mood.
We continued to talk every day and the sweetness of my words are always a part of my message to keep her impressed. I started to talk with her in personal so I can tell myself that I am also a man with actions and not only by words. When I was talking to her personally, I would often stuttered and it makes her think it's just a waste of her time.. I guess.. But the time I used to spend with her will never be a wasted time for me.
In a few other weeks or almost months.. After we got home from the art museum, I asked her again if I can court on her, I said "payagan mo na ako kawawa naman ako :( lalo na pag bakasyon na tapos hindi pa kita naliligawan" and she replied: "Next week malalaman mo na yung sagot" I also replied: "Bakit hindi na lang ngayon? Ganun din naman" and I begged her again and again then she already allowed me to start the courtship.
That day was the happiest day of my life, and from that day, she already became a UNIVERSE to me... Especially when I felt her hand are perfectly fitted to the spaces between my fingers as I laid my head towards her shoulder with our hearts beating together.
I told her, again, that I hope she wouldn't get tired of my attitude. I told her I always wanted her, good or bad life. I also told her that I'm afraid of ghosts .. but nothing terrifies me more than to lose a girl that I cared the most.
Whenever We are out together with her friends, my food always tastes better as I feel her sitting beside me. She makes my food enjoyable and makes the taste last longer. Whenever I'm with her, the only place I want to be by her side. I always wanted to make her feel that she's the best lover. But as the time passes by... I've done mistakes, and the time has come that she wants me to stop courting on her..
I don't know if she's cold or just busy sometimes.. I guess I irritated her too much that made me push her into her limits. I was out of limit, and an asshole... But I'm just scared that the lack of communication is not good for us... So she said that she really can't handle to continue my panliligaw. My tears dropped heavily from my eyes. I wished that change was easy. I wished she really felt how important her existence is for me.. I have always told her that I would change no matter how hard she thinks that would happen..
So instead of being broken, I used my sadness as my challenge and a motivation to keep her. I really tried to change myself for the better and for her
of course. I studied harder, I focused on making my grades better to prove that I still really need her, I wanted her to be proud of me. I tried to change my attitude as hard as I can.. Yet, I wanted to make her feel overwhelmed so I took another extra effort. I closed my eyes and said to myself: "Malapit naman na mag valentines.. ibubuhos ko na."
