Selenas POV:
I’d already watched The Notebook, Tuck Everlasting, and now I was watching A Cinderella Story. I had already devoured two bowls of ice cream and I’d been crying nonstop for the past 3 hours. Not just because of Justin, actually it wasn’t really because of Justin, it was a girl thing. Watching all these movies and forcing myself to cry more and more. It made me feel better.
“Do you believe in love at first sight.” Austin said to Sam (characters from A Cinderella Story)
I took a deep breath, remembering when Justin said that to me, and I laughed. That was back before I even knew I loved him, he always made it pretty clear how he felt about me. At first he would make jokes about it, how we’d end up together, and how he’d treat me better than any of my boyfriend’s ever did before. When I was beginning to get feelings for Justin and know that they were real, that was one of his lines that hooked me in. Asking me if I believed in love at first sights, he insisted that from the first time he met me, he knew we’d be together.
I laid my head back down and choked back tears, what if things would never be okay again. I knew I was over exaggerating, things with me and Justin would work out we had to. This was just another dumb fight.
I took a deep breath and sat up watching the rest of the movie. I turned up the volume so loud so I could try to block out my own thoughts.
Justins POV:
I sat on my bed reading over emails, and texting Scooter back and forth figuring out everything that I’d be doing in the next month with my movie premier. I was able to keep myself busy for a while but my mind always went back to Selena. I slammed my laptop shut and told Scooter I was going to bed. I stared at my ceiling reliving the stupid fight. What had gotten in to me, I didn’t understand why I was mad at her. She was freaked and it was her way of copping, but I was freaked too. I understand guys are supposed to be the strong ones in a relationship but what kept me calm throughout most of the day before we got on the plane was thinking of just spending 8 hours with Selena watching movies, Youtube clips anything but I knew I’d be with her.
“I’m an idiot.” I said out loud and grabbed my phone. I dialed Selenas number.
“Hold on J.” She said as she answered the phone I could hear her TV in the background, she never had it that loud unless she was watching a sad movie. I took a deep breath, realizing how bad I had hurt her.
Selenas POV:
The movie was at my favorite part. Sam was walking into the boys locker room looking for Austin to light up in to him.
“Waiting for you is like waiting for rain in this drought, useless and disappointing.” I said out loud in sync with Sam.
I started crying and I looked towards my phone. I had been waiting for Justin to call or text me like he usually did when we fought. I hardly ever had to text him first, even if I had started the fight. But it’s almost been 4 hours and I haven’t heard anything from him.. I repeated that quote over and over again in my head from the movie. Hoping that waiting for Justin wasn’t useless and disappointing. Just as I rolled over hugging my pillow drowning back into the voices coming from my TV.
Just as I was drifting to sleep I heard a familiar melody, I thought it was in my head till I heard my phone vibrating on the nightstand. I rolled over quickly and saw Justin’s name on my screen.
“Hold on J.” I said loudly scrambling to find my remote and turn my TV down.
“Selena…” I heard Justin breath into the phone when I finally muted my TV.
“Hi J.” That was all I could come up with.
“Are you okay?” He asked with a concerned tone, he must’ve heard how loud my TV was. Only him and Taylor knew why I’d have my TV so loud.
“J, I’m just scared. I don’t want this to happen again… I mean don’t get me wrong. I love that were back together, but this was the main problem in our relationship. You not sharing your emotions. You bottle everything up when it really hurts, or vice versa. You can’t ever express how hurt you are, or how happy you are…” I was still crying but I was able to keep it quiet, this was something that I’ve kept bottled up for the past 2 years, from when we were together. It was the one imperfection in him.
“Selena, what do you want me to say. I, I don’t know. I get scared alright, when we finally were together I just…” He paused, I was waiting for him to continue but it didn’t sound like he was going to.
“See here we go again, Justin!” I screamed into the phone, it was more hurt than frustration. How can he do this to me, shut me out when I’m always there for him?
“Selena, fuck… I’m sorry okay. I am sorry. I’m trying I really am I just… Can I come over?” He asked fumbling over his words.
“It’s 2 am Justin.” I wanted him here, I wanted him in my arms but for what reason. So he could come over and make me forget about this problem and forgive him like he usually did. No I couldn’t do it, not again.
“Selena, I told you this time would be different I mean it. So please, I’m coming over. That’s it alright, I will not hurt you anymore because of this. If your front doors not open I’ll sleep in my car till you let me in. But I’ll be over in 30 minutes Selena. I love you.” And he hung up. Just like that he hung up the phone. I swallowed hard and tears were still flowing from my eyes.
I placed my phone down on the night stand. Letting all the emotions I’ve buried deep down inside from the past surface. Remembering what it’s like to give your all to somebody who won’t even open up their deepest secrets to you. I remembering begging Justin over and over again to talk to me, and in the end he’d just end up getting mad. Yelling at me, and telling me to shut up. He wasn’t mean though, because whenever I didn’t bring it up, we were fine, we were happy. I knew he loved me, but he was scared of love. Loving someone who’s scared of love is by far the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life and now I’m supposed to believe he’s ready to change? He’s ready to open up.
I was curled in to a ball in my bed reliving everything from our past I tucked away to keep myself sane. I had forgotten how confused I was with Justin.
It had only been 10 minutes since he hung up the phone and said he was on his way, so I walked downstairs unlocked my front door then walked back into my room and stood in front of my mirror.
“It’s time Selena, you can do this.” I said to myself, trying to give myself a peep talk.
Usually whenever I said it was time, I’d chicken out and let Justin get his way. But not this time, we need to fix this, we need to fix us.
