Vengeance (On Hold)

Chapter one: Last Chance

"Tell me the truth Joe?" Neil grabbed my shoulders and stared angrily into my eyes. "I have loved you all my life," he said. "I thought you love me. But you are re-uniting with your ex by keeping his love letters safe in your drawer. Do you love him?"

"I ... I love you Neil," I tried to free my shoulders from Neil's hands. "You know I left my ex because of his drugs habit. He still loves me but I hate him. He is taking vengeance from me for leaving him. It's not my fault. I didn't want to show you his love letters because I was afraid of loosing you. That's why I hid them inside my drawer."

"Joe," Neil rolled his eyes at me. "You never keep your drawer unlocked but I thank God you forgot to lock it. I lost my important documents and accidentally I checked your drawer. I thought maybe by mistake my documents got mixed with yours. Your drawer was the only place I hadn't checked. I apologise I have opened your drawer in your absence. But I strongly feel you're hiding your ex's love letters not from months but from years. Am I true?"

"No, you are absolutely wrong," I clarified. "I don't love my ex and I haven't broken your trust. Don't blame me."

I looked at Neil, hoping my words be believed. But, he just frowned at me. "I don't believe you Joe. You're a lier."

My heart skipped a beat and fear tightened my throat as I looked at Neil. He always told me that his relationship with me was based on trust. My opinion was different from him. I believed my relationship with him was based not only on trust but on mutual understandings.

Neil and I had fought before several times but Neil had never abused me and was always polite in our arguments. The reason for his polite behavior towards me was his love for me. I had also never abused him and was always polite with him. I too love him and that's the reason for my polite behavior towards him. Neil was only getting jealous because my ex was sending me love letters. So, he was blaming me. But I know he loves me.

Neil was arrogant and threw things to control his anger. He even broke my antique glass plate that I brought from Alaska last year. I hate this habit of him. He once told me when he was in school, his teacher slapped him for getting less marks in the class test. He grew so angry that he broke glass tubes his teacher brought from the laboratory for demonstration. Since then he controlled his anger like that. Today he was in no mood of breaking things. I bitted my fingers and studied his expressions. What was going inside his mind? The moment I could say anything, he slapped me hard on my face. I didn't knew where his polite behavior suddenly disappeared. Was he so jealous?

"Don't slap me," I cried.

"I hate tears," Neil yelled. "I hate who breaks my trust."

My breathing became rapid against my rib cage. Sweat dropped from my forehead and my pulse was beating in my throat. I had always looked at life through pessimistic eyes. I don't know the reason why but I felt I'd never achieve anything in life.

"I will make Neil believe me," I kept repeating to myself.

Neil dragged his suitcase kept under the bed. He started packing his clothes but I stopped him and took his hand. "Where are you going?"

"Away from you," Neil said. "I will not stay with you in Texas anymore. I will shift to Los Angeles."

"Please, believe me Neil," I almost pleaded. "What will I do without you?"

"Go to hell," Neil fumed. "Go wherever you want to. I don't care."

Neil was totally different from others. When he was young, he liked to hang out with his friends whether he was happy or not. His nature changed after he got married to me. He liked when I kissed him on his lips. My kiss made him happy.

"Are you lost?" Neil clicked his fingers. "What are you thinking?"

I wrapped my arms around Neil's waist. His bright blue eyes gazed into my hazel green eyes and I titled my head slowly to kiss him. We kissed for an hour. Neil pushed me back and wiped his mouth with his hands.

"Don't kiss me again," he said. "Those days were different when I was upset and you kissed me on my lips to make me feel happy. I no more wanted your kiss. I know how I can make myself happy."

"I know your likes Neil," I frowned. "You'll either hang out with your friends or read some novels. But you'll only be depressed. If you think it's my fault, give me one last chance to prove myself? I will clear all the confusion."

"OK, I give you a month," Neil said."If you will not prove yourself next month on my birthday, I will divorce you. I'm not joking. I am being polite to you that doesn't mean you'll chuckle. My heart has been broken because of your ex. We save only those letters we love so that we can read it afterwards. I don't know why I'm unable to ease my pain inside my heart and so I want you to prove you love me and not your ex. Have now understood why all of a sudden I am thinking of giving you divorce?"

Neil was 27 years old and three years older than me. On his every birthday, I baked cakes for him. I never want to spoil his birthday because of Daniel's letters. I wiped the corner of my eyes with the sleeves of my shirt.

"I will only prove I'm innocent because you are blaming me," I said. "My love doesn't needs to be proved. All I know is I'm true to you. Keep that in mind."

Neil went out of the room and slammed the door. I collapsed on my chair. My eyelids went up and down, and up again. Suddenly, I felt terrible weight on my shoulder. Whenever I was upset, I wrote short stories or novels. I even thought to write my own love story but I didn't wanted to describe about my dates with Neil, or Neil's family or my family or how we got married. I wasn't writing my autobiography. But right now, I didn't wanted to right novel or stories. I didn't even want to throw things like what Neil usually did to control his anger. When I pressed my fingers in anguish, I harmed myself psychologically. I like to sit inside a locked room in front of mirror for hours. I like to shout and cry. I had developed this habit when my best friend betrayed me and befriended the topper of my class. I grew so angry that I locked myself inside my room and cried for whole night. My parents were worried and when they broke the door I was found unconscious and injured. My parents showed me to psychiatrist and I was given medication. I stopped harming myself but after my parents death in an air crash, I developed my habit again. My younger sister Fiona who was the only member left in my family didn't allowed me to tell Neil that I was shown to a psychiatrist and I harmed myself physically. My sister didn't wanted Neil to call me insane like what my ex-husband Daniel called me when he took drugs. She only told me to tell Neil that I locked myself inside my room and cry for hours if he noticed my habit.

"What should I do now?" I thought. "Should I talk to Neil once again or should I wait for a month?"

I decided to talk to Neil. I got up and went out of the room. As I walked down the stairs, I heard the sound of telly. Neil was watching telly in the living room.

"Neil, baby I love you." I sat besides Neil and pushed few strands of my hair behind my ear. "I could do anything for you. Why don't you understand?"

"Why should I understand?" Neil said. "You've hidden your ex's love letters from me. God forbid, I don't know if you've sex with him in my absence. I don't stay all day at home. I am a professor."

I covered my mouth in amazement. "Are you suspecting on me?"

"Yes, I'm suspecting on you," Neil said. "Now, get lost."

A single tear dropped down my cheek. "Fiona would definitely give me some solution to my problem," I uttered to myself. "I should call her."

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Hey guys, this is Kelly. Thankyou for reading! This is my first book. I hope you have liked first chapter. I will be updating next chapter on Wednesday. I know after reading this chapter many questions are going on in your mind like how Joe met Neil, what's their past, why Neil is mad at her (Jealousy is not the main reason), why Joe is not desperate to leave him... Next chapter will answer all your questions. So meet you guys on Wednesday.
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