It was a Saturday morning in the small and picturesque village of Redrashbottom. Banana Bob was having a cup of piping hot coffee while skim reading the Whipcream News, Redrashbottom’s local paper. His son was getting ready to go work. He worked part time in the Polishmyfinger Inn, the local village pub. During the week he would also go to college.
After his son left that morning, Banana Bob began to think about things. He wanted more from life, and he wanted to go on a massive adventure. He was a middle aged divorced banana who had recently retired after serving as a watermelon officer for over two decades. He spent most days in retired life listening to Led Zeppelin whilst drinking endless cups of coffee, his son was never in to keep him company so he was beginning to get bored and was wasting his life away.
So a few days later after packing his bags and emptying his bank accounts, Banana Bob said goodbye to his son and headed for the hills. He had never ventured further than a few miles from Redrashbottom but this did not faze him, as he wanted to see the world.
After a few hours of walking, Banana Bob came across a group of four giant grapes who were having a picnic on top of a hill. Before approaching the grapes, Banana Bob looked back, he could see a tiny dot in the distance, it was Redrashbottom, slowly becoming too small to even see on the horizon.
“Hello, I’m Banana Bob!” Said Banana Bob.
“Hi there Banana Bob, I’m Dick, and this is Willy, Shaft and Purple, we are four giant grapes going on an adventure.” Said Dick, who seemed to be the leader of the group. The other grapes all acknowledged Banana Bob too with a waves. Banana Bob liked the grapes a lot.
“Can I join you? You all seem very nice.” Said Banana Bob
“NO.” Shouted Dick, and the four grapes then vanished into thin air.
Banana Bob was dazzled, how strange! The four grapes who seemed to like Banana Bob rejected his company and vanished into thin air, Banana Bob was now very upset, but carried on walking.
Later on that day after what felt like endless walking, rain began to fall and Banana Bob decided to seek refuge for the night in an old cave. Redrashbottom was now completely out of sight, he must had walked nearly twenty miles if not more. Banana Bob sat down in the cave, watching the rain fall and looking across the vast landscape, the view was a view of how far he had come. There were little villages dotted around but in general it was simply a vast, empty and miserable view. The rain then began to fall harder and the sun was beginning to set. Banana Bob stayed up just staring for a few more minutes, thinking about the four giant grapes, his home and son before dozing off, the next day was going to be long so he needed a good night’s sleep.
The next morning, Banana Bob woke up and set off. Just like the day before, he walked for hours and hours across the vast landscape until dusk. He did this every day for over two weeks, and never saw anything interesting, just a few villages and large empty fields.
After a long night’s sleep, Banana Bob woke up and began walking again like he had been doing for the past fifteen days. On this particular day however, Banana Bob’s adventure would start to begin. As he climbed to the top of yet another hill, a giant blue forest came into view on the horizon. At first he thought it was an ocean or a lake, but as he began to get closer it was pretty clear that it was a forest. Banana Bob had obviously seen forests before, but not a blue one, it was a dazzling sight. As this was an adventure of a lifetime, Banana Bob couldn’t resist the temptation to enter, ignoring the “do not enter” signs, and the general spooky feel of the area. He headed in, but after not long, Banana Bob ran back as fast as he could as he had second thoughts. He would soon learn though that this was no use, as even though he had only walked around a mile into the forest, after hours of running he couldn't find the edge, or where he entered. It was the stuff of nightmares, a forest which once you enter, you cannot leave. Banana Bob was now panicking.
Banana Bob though came to terms with his situation, he realised it was no use running anymore, the magical forest had trapped him in and there was no escape. He decided to walk back, deeper into the forest to see if he could reach the other side, despite the possibility of there not being an other side.
Banana Bob spent weeks walking through the blue, mystical forest and had yet to see any sort of edge. He was going to give up hope and starve himself to death, but before he could do that he noticed objects moving in the distance. He slowly walked towards the moving objects, and as he came closer, he realised what it they were...
It was the four grapes from earlier on in the adventure.
"Hey…! Hey…!” Shouted Banana Bob.
“Well look who it is, it’s Banana Bob! What are you doing here? You shouldn't be here.” Shouted Dick, the leader of the four grapes.
“I entered but could not leave, this forest something in for me.” Cried Banana Bob.
"No no no, you have it all wrong Banana Bob, this forest isn’t magical at all, you just have to say the magic words and you will be able to leave.” Replied Dick.
The other three grapes were beginning to become restless, nudging Dick and whispering to him that they need to go and that they should simply leave Banana Bob behind.
“Listen Banana Bob, just say the words Pink Heptagon, and you will be able to leave the forest, it’s as simple as that.” Said Dick.
"Okay thank you, PINK HEPTAGON!” Screamed Banana Bob.
A few moments later, a giant flying elephant with extremely sharp teeth swooped down and ripped banana bob to pieces. Banana juice flew everywhere as the giant elephant slaughtered Banana Bob in the space of a few seconds. The four grapes laughed and carried on their journey deep into the forest. The giant flying elephant then flew away, leaving behind the mutilated remains of poor banana bob.
So the moral of the story is, never read trust red oranges, as they wear cheap halloween costumes.
The end.
