Looking for the light

Pain of life

Walking in the streets
With my jacket open

The cold wind is touching my skin
The warmth of the sun is lighting my face

I keep walking and walking without no reason
I just walk.....

I see people looking at me

A lot of people are looking sad or angry or scared

I smile to them and they feel better

I smile for everyone

My smile is a light from heaven
A gift from god

From the outside I look happy, beautiful and strong

From the inside I look sad, ugly and miserable

When you look into my eyes
You can see my pain

I don't feel happy

I don't think I am beautiful

I don't think I am strong

But still others see the difference

They see a happy girl

What I see when I look in the mirror is a mess

And I started seeing it from the outside also

My hair is flat from pulling it out
Under my eyes it is dark because I can't sleep
My eyes is red and tired because of crying myself to sleep

I don't feel happiness but I still look happy to make others happy

To make your day the best.

This is my pain in life