Struggling for Hope (Larry Stylinson)

1. Harry

I don't get it. I don't get why bad things happen to good people or how people can believe "good things come to those who wait." I also don't understand how the moon doesn't actually shine but the sun reflects from it. The sun has all the power and the moon would be nothing without it. Why do people take advantage of life? Why do they only care about themselves? Why  can't good people get second chances?

I wrote all of these thoughts down that were flying through my head in a small notebook placed on my lap. I was currently sitting in the doctors office waiting for results. Results for what? A couple months ago I was sick. I thought it was maybe just the flu until I went to the hospital and got blood taken and now I might have leukemia.

It's a very scary thing considering the fact that it's just me. I have no family. Both my mom and dad died in a car accident and my sister got married and moved to America with her husband. And here I am, left all alone at 19. I wasn't exactly complaining. It was nice to have the house to myself and be able to party on weekdays without your mom yelling at you to clean up the mess the next morning. But it did get lonely. When I was struggling with school and just needed someone to help me understand things; up at 3 in the morning pulling at my hair trying to understand things for the test that was the next day.

"Harry Styles." The nurse called from the desk with an envelope in her hands. I closed my notebook and slowly made my way over to her. My legs felt like noodles making it hard to walk. She brought me to an office and sat down in the chair motioning me to sit down in the other chair next to the desk. Her fingers slip to open the envelope and she pulled out a couple sheets of paper.

"How have you been feeling lately?" She asked as she fixed her glasses on the bridge of her nose. I shrugged my shoulders. "I feel fine."

The nurse nodded slowly and her eyes traced all over the paper. I swallowed thickly before she looked up at me. "Harry.." She started. "We've found something in your blood." My heart stopped and my ears automatically tuned out to whatever she was explaining. I knew this was coming. "You have acute myeloid leukemia. It's a type of cancer that forms new blood cells and are usually found in the soft inner part of the bones called the bone marrow. The name might be hard to understand and I know it's a lot to take in so I'll go slowly. This type of leukemia means that it  can grow quickly, and if it is not treated it could be fatal in a couple of months. Now, we have got you a great doctor and you chemo starts next Wednesday so there's nothing to worry about." 

I didn't respond. My body was frozen and I was beyond speechless. Was I going to die? Die alone, with no family or friends? 

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You guys have no idea how excited I am to be writing again! I have really big plans for this story and I hope you guys enjoy reading it as much as I love writing it! I have a little experiance with cancer (family members deaths) but I have no had it personally so it will be a litte challenging to write it. I'm sorry if you do have cancer and I hope this story does not make you feel bad or it's not written in a way you experienced it yourself. And in no way am I putting people down for that. Cancer is a horrible thing but it shouldn't make the people horrible for having it. Stay strong guys!:)