The theory on moving fast in a world of bloodhounds

The world was dark and ruthless and bold as the hours went by, the Honda drove past the wet pavement once again, back and forth making a quite rumble like the beating heart of a wolf looking for something more than just food. The night was old but the day was new and I contemplated this metaphor as I sat behind the dumpster of the only Denny’s in town. I knew the sound of the wolf and the man inside the metal beast would find me eventually, but I didn’t want to move, I guess it was the thrill I was more in love with than the actual plan of running away. The sad truth for a half assed rebel living in her Jackson Pollock world, not something I enjoy admitting but I was evidently a dreamer and never completely a live young die hard mutinous teen. Just the trill, oh the trill! It is to kill for. My heart aches at the thought of doing it again , the rush and the adrenalin, oh and the freedom of the “running away” from everything and nothing and seeing it all turn to grass stains on the green pants of our true meaning, if anything I am enlightened more than the world around me, I can see the gates that we have forged and wrapped around ourselves for years on end, and I can taste the sweet dew of the world we left behind, but I am not so holy to see as to why we left that land and how I may get back to the other side, the side I am intertwined with and feel in my lungs. That is why I can only ever glimpse at the light with the trill of the “running away” because if I stare to long with my modern aged eyes I am sure I would be blinded by what we have all forgotten. And because I want to see the world when I am ready I sit behind this goddamn dumpster. I sit here and I wait for the Honda to pull up and unleash the guard that will drag me back into the self-righteous world I so wish to shake off. But I am eternally a hypocrite because the world I so wish to be done with is the only thing that can ever give me my “running away” high. Oh and how I would hate to see the day when I am unable to have that high. I would think they would have me locked away because I would have turned into another psychopath that cannot function in “today’s society”. Basically fancy words for 'we are not willing to help you'. So I am trapped, despite my telling myself that I can someday be free. But that’s what I do, that’s what we all do…. Lie to ourselves for our benefit. I know I will never get to the “other side” because there truly is no “other side” that world was burned to the ground long, long ago and from the ashes my world stands on Band-Aid covered legs. I am just a fool, a teenage fool. And I probable won’t live long.