Begin Again

1 - Ethan

Erin's POV

Erin couldn't tell if it was sweat or tears streaming down the sides of her cheeks. She heard the heart-crushing sound of the baby's cry, loud and unsettling. Will had officially delivered him, and that made Erin feel better. She was still panicked after realizing her new baby was born just over a month early.

"You did so good." Jay was kissing her hand, his eyes glittering with a mix of stress and excitement.

Even though the pain was mostly gone, Erin felt like she had just run a few marathons.

After what seemed like forever, Will slowly handed Erin the tiny baby, wrapped in a blue and white blanket, eyes open, still crying loud and clear. He was only the size of Jay's hand.

"Shh," Erin laughed weakly, tears welling up in the corners of her eyes. "It's okay. Mommy's got you."

Jay caressed the tiny infant's head in his hand and kissed it gently. "Hey," He looked to Will, daring to tear his gaze away from his baby boy. "Can you call Voight and have him bring Hailey over with him?"

"Yeah, sure," Will pulled out his phone as the nurses began gathering the equipment used to clear the baby's airway and such.

Erin smiled down at the tiny child that she could call her own. His huge, blue eyes stared directly up at her. He seemed frightened but curious, like he wasn't sure what he thought of the world yet.

But Erin thought that was fine, because he had a long life to live yet.

"So," Jay smiled, looking down at the baby. "We didn't firmly decide on a name."

Erin's eyes widened. "Oh my God. Um, what did we have? Jaxon and Ethan?"

He nodded.

"Which one do you like more?"

"Both." He smirked, making Erin roll her eyes.

"Come on, Jay. I'm too exhausted to make a decision. This is important." She looked back down at the baby, who seemed highly interested of what his name was going to be. Erin almost wondered if he already understood English.

"Ethan," Jay said, making Erin's eyes make contact with his again. "I think we should name him Ethan."

She smiled as he leaned forward and kissed her forehead, whispering, "I love it."

...

Jay's POV

"Mommy!" Hailey's blonde french braid bounced as she climbed onto the hospital bed to look at her new baby brother.

"Shh," Jay smiled at his wide-eyed three year-old daughter. "You don't want to wake him up."

She let out a quiet squeal as Erin moved to hold the baby in front of her.

"Daddy, you see him?" she asked excitedly, turning to face Jay.

He laughed a little. "Yeah, I did. Isn't he small?"

"He's really tiny," she whispered. "He comes from your belly, mom?"

Erin swallowed. "Yeah, sweetie. He did." She looked at Jay, her forehead still a little damp and her eyes tired. "Jay, you want to help her hold him?"

He nodded and first helped Erin sit back. He gently took the four-pound infant from her arms and caressed his precious son in his hands for a moment before Hailey became anxious. He carefully lowered Ethan into Hailey's arms and helped her hold his small head up.

"Hey," Hank walked into the room with his hands in his police vest.

"You still on the clock?" Jay asked, greeting his father-in-law with a pat on the back.

"Yeah, but after I grabbed Hailey I figured I'd stick around and meet the kid." He leaned over the bed and rubbed Erin's forehead as she forced a weak smile. "How are you doing?"

"Fine," she replied, nodding and swallowing hard again. "I just need some rest."

"Grandpa, look at this! It's mommy's baby!" Hailey screamed excitedly through a whisper.

"Wow!" Hank acted with enthusiasm. "He sure is cute, huh?"

"Uh-huh!" She exclaimed as she tried to lift Ethan to Hank.

Jay took him from her arms slowly and offered him to Voight, who nodded and took the infant against his vest. He adjusted his blanket so he wasn't leaning against his strong vest, and stroked his thin, brown hair.

After a few minutes of quiet talking, Natalie stepped into the room. "Hank? There's P.D. here waiting for you. Congrats, guys." She smiled to Jay and Erin before leaving again.

"I gotta head out," Voight said with his usual rusty tone.

"Thanks for stopping by," Erin whispered, squeezing his hand.

"Of course," he nodded, patting Jay's shoulder and surprisingly pulling him into a hug. Jay patted his back again before he hugged Hailey and headed out.

"Babe, you want to take her to that ice-cream shop down the street so I can get a little sleep?" Erin reached out to hold Jay's hand. He kissed the back of her hand and nodded. He set Ethan back in his pediatric crib.

"Hey, Bug, you want some ice-cream?" Jay picked Hailey up from the hospital bed and let her say goodbye to Erin before heading out, the only thing on his mind how lucky he was to have a mostly healthy family and a perfect wife.