Tightrope; A New Romance

Chapter 10- Internal Struggle

How could one man be so heartless?

If Kade still thought I was here to help him, he couldn't be any more wrong.

That wasn't even what hurt the most. Erik hadn't told me anything about me being used as a...a weapon...did he even know about it?

Of course he did, he had to.

Was Adrian going to get in trouble for telling me when he wasn't supposed to?

This was all too much. I needed to leave, I needed my normal life back.

I needed mum, Mike and Ellie.

I needed to be home.

Thoughts of my friends and family flooded my head and more tears ran down my cheeks. I swear I'd done enough crying to last a lifetime, but I really couldn't take this anymore. It was all too much.

I jumped off the bed, and pulled my suitcase from underneath the bed and began dumping all my clothes in it. My hands were all shaky; my tears uncontrollable; I'd barely been here for 24 hours but I needed to leave. Right. Now. I didn't know how exactly, but they're had to be some way out of this hell, someone that would help me...

At 2pm, there was a knock on my door; I still felt like absolute crap and I was sure I looked like it as well. I didn't get up to answer it, only moved to sit against the bed with my knees up against my chest and waited for whoever it was to let themselves in, but they didn't.

"Scarlett?"

Erik.

"Are you alright?"

I didn't reply. I had no words.

I could hear him sigh from the other side of the door. "I know you're in there. I just, I wanted to say I'm sorry I didn't tell you before...you wouldn't have understood."

So he did know about it.

Liar.

I decided that I was leaving anyway, it might as well be a good time as ever to give Erik a piece of my mind.

I ran to the door and opened it with as much force as I could. He looked tired and rugged, his hair messy and irresistibly sexy. For a half a second, my rage vanished and I wanted to reach out and hold him, to have him comfort me; he was really the only person here who felt a little like home and if there was ever a time I needed him, it was now.

Erik pushed pass me and made his way into my room and I froze for a brief moment. I didn't know what to say to him; my feelings were mixed.

"Going somewhere?' he gestured to my open suitcase.

"I'm going home." I spoke, trying to keep my voice strong.

His eyes met mine and I looked away. "How?"

I crossed my arms over my chest. "I'll find a way."

He cocked an eyebrow. "Will you now?"

I felt so utterly annoyed with him. "What do you want, Erik?"

"I came to apologise," he took a step closer to me. "I didn't want to hurt you."

"Then why did you keep it from me?" This time I looked at him.

"I knew you and your family would refuse if I told you the truth."

"So you lured me in with your lies?!" I felt infuriated at him, and it showed through my voice.

"I didn't lie to you. I only wanted to protect you."

"No, you didn't Erik. You're Kade's bitch, you can't disobey him. It's not because you wanted to protect me, it's because you couldn't refuse."

"Don't act like you know me." His words were painful against my ears; harsh.

I swallowed down the lump in my throat. "Maybe I don't, but it's obvious by the way you act. You'll do anything Kade asks of you, I'm not sure you even have a mind of your own."

"Oh, really?" Another step closer. "So when I kissed you last night..."

My heart began to race the closer he got, blood rising to my cheeks as I recalled the event. "Were you using me then as well?"

Then it clicked. "Kade got you to do it so I would trust you, didn't he? Oh my God, I can't believe I ever-"

He cut me off. "No, Scarlett. I meant it." His eyes cut straight through me.

I shook my head. "Your lying again. Kade controls what you do. You have no choice."

"Is that so?" My hands became covered by his.

I was pretty sure he could hear the beat of my heart, sensing the fire in me that longed to leap out and kiss him. Even though I was so made at him, I needed to convert my rage into... something.

He leaned closer and I closed my eyes, waiting for the warmth of his lips to greet mine.

Instead, they graced my jaw, then more gentle ones trailed up to underneath my ear, each soft touch making me shiver and a small moan escape from my lips. It made me want him, urging for him to take it further. It didn't feel wrong anymore.

What happened to the we-can't-do-this display he'd put on this morning?

I felt like melting in his arms and my knees felt weak. My hands gripped his shoulders, making sure I had something to hold me up.

He breathed hot air into my ear and again I shivered. His voice was low, husky and little above a whisper.

"At least I'm the one who can restrain my emotions. Learn to control yourself."

And then he just turned around and left without looking at me.

The words cut me like knives. My chest became tight and the air rushed out of my lungs as I struggled to get a breath, as if I was being held underwater. I found it hard to understand why I was feeling this way, I'd known him for such a little time, but those few words he'd spoken had me unravelling.

Why would he do this? Was he not aware of how much pain I was in already? Did he feel obligated to cause me more? Did Kade put him up to this?

My throat burned and I began to cry all over again. My emotions were strung all over the place. Angry at Kade and Erik who brought me here to use me as their pawn, crushed over Erik's rejection and fear. Fear of being alone here. But I knew I already was.

In all my rage, I carelessly picked up the china lamp on the desk and threw it against the far wall, sending it shattering into hundreds of tiny little pieces. It strangely offered me the tiniest little bit of satisfaction. Now it was broken; just like me.

Next, I went for a glass vase with flowers sitting on the bookshelf and slammed it against the same wall, causing it to fragmentise into even more pieces than the lamp.

But this time, the glass went everywhere.

I quickly covered my eyes with my arms protecting then from the debris; I didn't release how far the glass could travel. Small jagged edges bit into my skin, causing choked screams to escape from my mouth.

The pain was sharp and agonising; it was an irritating reminder that I still was capable of feeling that emotion, even though I'd been through so much hurt the past few days and it didn't feel like I could take anymore.

I felt faint and my vision began to fade in and out. Looking down, blotches of crimson stained my arms and it didn't take me long to realise I'd made a stupid mistake. I needed help.

I staggered to my feet with great difficulty, my vision blurry and my head spinning in every different direction. But my footing slipped and I fell to ground, not before my head collided with something hard beside my bed. I tried to call out, but my voice would not obey my wish. Ever so slowly, I rolled onto my back, revealing a small puddle of red liquid seeping into the fluffy rug.

It was the last thing I saw before the darkness took a hold of me.