Stay ◇Karamel◇

14. dreaming of a nightmare

________
// Kara Danvers \\

I'm not used to feeling helpless.

I can normally keep myself busy even when there is no way for me to help. I could save someone from a burning building, stop a speeding car from hitting a family on the street, or any other heroic deed.

But right now, I couldn't take my eyes off of him.

Mon-El was laying on a med table in the DEO, unmoving. I wasn't sure how long it'd been; time wasn't all that important to me at the moment. His breath was steady, the beeping of the heart monitor was rhythmic. It was the only sound keeping me from melting down.

I gripped Mon-El's hand, my eyes glued to the floor. My head shot up once I heard the door swing open. It was Alex.

"We don't have the original VR that Maxwell Lord built," She said softly. "The tech team is working as fast as they can to follow his design and build a new one."

"Okay," I mumbled.

"Do you mind if I sit with you?" Alex asked. I nodded.

She pulled a chair towards me from the corner of the room, placing it next to me. Alex sat down, biting her lip.

"How are you doing?" She questioned. "I know this must be hard--"

"I just got back," I interrupted her. "I just got back. And now..he's hurt because of me."

"Not because of you," Alex argued. Her voice was soft. "You didn't do this."

"Cadmus did," I stated. "Because I escaped."

"Kara," She sighed. "You don't know that."

"I know it was," I said. "Who else would?"

Alex paused, not meeting my eyes. She knew I was right; she just didn't want to put the extra guilt on to my shoulders.

"Are you going to do it?" Alex asked. "Go into his head?"

"Of course," I nod. "I'd do anything to save him."

"You're probably the only one," Alex said. "He hasn't really connected with anyone on Earth like he has with you. He--"

"Needs me," I finish, looking down at his hand. I began to trace circles in it. "I know. And I'm going to save him. He trusted me to take care of him, and that's exactly what I'm going to do."

Alex nodded, swallowing hard. She got up, and walked out of the room, leaving me with Mon-El. I looked down at his palm.

I'm in your hands, Kara.

"I know," I whisper. "I won't let you down."

_________

"We have the machine built!" Winn exclaimed, running into the room. J'onn, Alex, and Maggie were behind him.

"Sorry it took so long," J'onn sighed. "The team had some difficulty finding the parts."

"It'll work, right?" I asked. Alex nodded.

"It should," She sighed. "You ready?"

I nodded, biting my lip. I stood up, and walked over to the medical table next to Mon-El. I sat down. Winn walked up to me, putting the helmet on my head. He slid the visor down over my eyes.

"You'll feel a small buzz," He warned me, as he fastened on the helmet. "It might shock you a bit."

"Okay," I say. "I'm ready."

I laid down, putting my head down gently on the cold surface.

There was a humming noise coming from all around me. Dots danced across my vision, the eyesight was becoming blurry. My entire body turned to pins and needles. 

It all disappeared as quickly as it began. I slowly began to lose feeling and familiarity in everything around me. Darkness began to flood my sight, and I held on to the side of the table.  My eyelids began to droop. I let go of my consciousness, letting it slip away from me.

You know-- you look beautiful, with the weight of all these worlds on your shoulders.