Dear friend

three

Dear friend,

The devil snuck up on me today, he took the actions I should have took and replaced them with the wrong ones. I ignored moms cries early this morning, which I have never done. I snuck my way out to the car and drove to the coffee place aunt kenzie showed me.

it was still warm and welcoming, it was still nearly empty. for the first time in a long time I didn't feel alone, I felt comfortable. You would have loved it here, the quite surroundings. the smell of pure caffeine clogged the navel. the chime bell of the shop door rang on and off through out the entirety of the many hours I had spent there, interrupting my reading for just a half of a second until I got lost in the world again. It was like I wasn't even sitting there, almost as if I was just a spec of dust of the bookcase that Is the world. I never stopped annotating, just the way you taught me, post-it's and highlighters kept forever in my bag.

the post-it's reminded me that I had to do some research on atheists; not sure of the outcome. because heaven; the notation of you watching over me never escaped my head. answers were needed.

My eyes scrolled across the pages and stories, the silly words written to simply entertain a weak mind. "BrainyQuote.com", I scrolled through the boxes of quotes, of most I could not understand, until I found one.

"She believed in nothing; only her skepticism kept her from being an atheist."

I stopped and thought, exactly of what I am unsure, but I am sure of one thing. I am not what you would call an 'atheist', I am a skeptic. I do not pray, I do not hope, but I do wish. I wish for an answer, an explanation. where have you gone? where can I find you? are you waiting?

Much thanks,

Lacy.