Icy raindrops thrust themselves from the sky, stabbing me ferociously. Rain blurs my vision and soaked hair clings to my forehead. Bitter air ripples over the car park. I tug sleeves over my numb fingers, shivering.
I hear crunching gravel, warm footsteps approaching. And a voice that rings like church bells, heating my chilled face as I swing around and our eyes meet. I wait for his arms to enclose me and his warmth to seep into me, clashing with the coldness.
But instead he just looks at me with eyes like the frosty rain. "Sorry, I took a while."
Another heavy blob cascades down my face. I open my mouth to respond but the ability to speak has dissolved within my airways. A hard feeling is in my throat, like I've swallowed bricks. Just looking at him feels like my entire body is shattering. I should leave now.
I gaze into his glowing blue orbs. His face is heavenly, venting a soft gleam like the luminous moon. My face shrivels up, small tears spurting from my eyes. I quickly wipe them with my sleeve. Sucking in a deep breath, I spit the words out. "I can't keep doing this."
Without a trace of emotion, he nods. He turns from me, striding off.
His silhouette dwindles away in the murky horizon and I am left with my heart pounding and frosty tears caking my cheeks, standing in the lonely landscape like the nude skeleton of a tree in winter.
I am withering, leafless. Without his affection, I am incapable of even producing oxygen.
I stay rooted to the ground, shivering and staring pointlessly at the distance he disappeared into. I am enveloped in existence and life is a serpent that coils around me, strangling.
My legs begin to walk and soon steps carry me away to an unfamiliar place where cloud tears surge down even more violently, tinting the world grey. Gnarly trunks stretching towards heaven line a stone path. You're just like me, I think to the trees. The way they tremble in the storm signals their agreement with me.
Sadness seeps from my eyes as mist drenched rows of gloomy trees flash past. The sky has become an ocean and the fuzzy clouds are floundering fish, the trees and I wilting coral reefs. I am drowning in air. My desperate breaths release bubbles.
It's pointless to want him and pointless dating or not dating him because either way I'll be submerged in this ceaseless tragedy. Everything I do is pointless because eventually I'll die. My whole existence is pointless. In fact the entire universe is pointless. It doesn't make sense how or why the universe even exists. There should have been no universe, nothing at all. I can't help wishing for it, although it's silly and pointless since once existence has begun it is irreversible, and it is impossible to imagine complete nothingness, which is not just vacant infinite blackness, but absolutely nothing.
Nightmarish sounds of weather abruptly screech to silence. The contorted universe is a merry go round, stuck in a spinning frenzy. My friends wave their wooden bones limply, saying goodbye as I collide with the ground. Blackness swallows up the atmosphere.
Ethereal light gushes through my eyelids. The quaint chirping of birds eases me awake. I open my eyes, stretch, and sit up.
I pry a twig out of my hair and inspect it. Tiny green buds sprout from fragile fingers. I tilt my head and gaze upwards through outspread forest arms. Newly born leaves flutter on their branches. Spring has almost cast its soft presence upon earth.
Stormy night floods have sunk into the soil and nourished their roots. Soon seasons will change and sprouting leaves will grow into large green canopies.
During the cold maybe they realised the point to their existence, although it was a pointless point. Perhaps all along their point was simply to find a point.
After they have been engulfed by piercing winter and their crushed brown leaves have drifted away on breaths of dust, leaving nothing but spindly sticks, somehow they always manage to blossom again.
Maybe summer will come soon.
