For The Rest Of Our Lives // an Orson Krennic fanfic

Chapter 9: Strange Feelings

Carrie's POV

This wasn't really happening. There was no way this was happening... right?

I was in some kind of shock, was Director Krennic really kissing me? This wasn't real, I was dreaming... but it felt so real it made me wonder why this was happening. He hated the Rebellion, he was an imperial director, so why was he doing this? Was he trying to get me to trust him and tell him everything? Because if so, it was beginning to work.

After a few seconds, I kissed back and ignored everything else, I forgot the fact that I was a Rebel and that my mission was to destroy everything he'd ever worked for. And it felt... no words can really describe what I felt like at that point. Time seemed to stop and he pulled back and looked at me in the eye for less than five seconds, then he turned and walked away, not saying a word, leaving me there, still in shock of what just happened

Was he going to let me escape once again? This seemed really weird and suspicious but I wasn't going to question it too much.

After a few minutes, I saw the Imperial ships leave the planet, followed by Krennic's shuttle... was it really safe to go back to the base? Or was it better to stay here for a while until he was completely out of sight? However, he already knew about Yavin IV and  all that and he hadn't attacked the base yet... something wasn't right with him and I sure as hell was going to find out what, he was devoted to the Empire, so why didn't he kill us when we refused to give him any kind of information? Everything was so confusing and the fact that he had just kissed me and left without an explanation wasn't making it any easier for me, especially now that I had to go back to the ship with Baze, Chirrut, Kay and Cassian

I got to the ship and Cassian and Baze started asking me where Jyn and Bodhi were and what had happened out there, I simply told them that I had managed to escape, I basically told them the truth, I just avoided some information they wouldn't like, so it couldn't hurt them, but while they asked me all those questions, I only had one thing in my mind, and it wasn't Bodhi nor Jyn, it wasn't even related to them. It was something I shouldn't be thinking about because it shouldn't have even happened.

"How did you manage to escape?" Cassian suddenly asked, I froze, he wasn't suspicious, just curious, he didn't  have any reasons to not trust me "you don't seem to be hurt" he said.

"I guess luck is on my side" more like Director Krennic was on my side, but he didn't need to know any details. After that, we left the planet, I didn't know if we were going to Yavin or somewhere else, but I didn't really care. My mind just went back to him.

Always him... why couldn't I think of something else? I knew it wasn't right to think about him after what had just happened.

Why did I have to meet him? Why did he have to be like this? Why did he have to have those eyes? (A/N okay that is me talking) And most importantly, why did he have to kiss me? I needed answers but I knew I wouldn't get them, no matter what, I couldn't talk to anyone in the Rebellion nor the Empire -not that I wanted to- and I couldn't go to the imperial director and ask him 'hey Krennic, I know we hate each other, but why did you kiss me?' Yeah... that wasn't going to happen. I was so fucked at that point in my life, but I didn't expect it to get ant easier.

I was alone, and I felt alone, he had somehow managed to get inside my head and fuck it all up, this was not supposed to happen, we were supposed to come here, save the planet from the Empire's clutches, and leave... not get Jyn and Bodhi captured and kissed by Krennic himself... nor think about him all the time for weeks. Ugh, I hated this feeling, I felt like I wanted him to kiss me again, but that could not happen, this had to be forgotten, we just had to get Jyn and Bodhi back and forget about this day.

"Should we get them back now?" Kay asked as we flew closer to the Death Star, I saw Krennic's shuttle get in the battle station, I panicked for a second, I didn't want to face him, not now.

"No, Cassian is injured, we should head back to Yavin and get as many people as we can to help, we can't win in there, we're only five and one of us is injured, they have thousands of troopers" they all nodded and Cassian frowned, but he knew we were going to do what I said, K would listen to me if I was looking out for Cassian.

We got to the base and Cassian and I went to Senator Organa "senator!" I called, he turned to us and smiled "Jyn Erso and Bodhi Rook were captured by the Empire today, we need the best warriors we can get to go to the Emperor's battle station and get them back" he looked at Cassian's injured leg "yeah... that's why I need the help, he can't come"

"What?! Yes I can, I'm going!" He argued, I turned to him, making him shut up immediately.

We followed Bail inside and... I didn't pay much attention to anything thanks to someone... I imagined his eyes, I remember how his lips felt against mine... okay, Carrie stop. "let's go" I blinked and looked at Cassian, who seemed to be waiting for some kind of reaction to something "what's wrong?" He asked slightly concerned "you aren't yourself today"

I smiled and shook my head "it's nothing, I've just been thinking about some things..." I reassured, he started walking to the ship and I followed him "where are we going?"

He chuckled "to get Jyn and Bodhi back" we got inside the ship and went to get our friends back, as we got closer to the Death Star, I started to get worried, what if he was there? Fuck, I shouldn't even care about that, so what if he was? It's not like he was going to stop me nor change my mind about the whole situation we were all living.