(A little forewarning: While all of the chapters may be a part of the same story, the points in time in which they happen may vary. It is not chronological and may not even be placed that way or completed. This is just me writing down ideas for a story.)
Fuck trains. Fuck switches on trains. Fuck everything that ever has to go wrong. These were the thoughts going through Isaac's head. Frustration and a newly found hatred for trains filled his head. "Breathe." He grumbled, counting three seconds for each inhale and exhale. Isaac gazed around the cramped compartment, looking for any switches to flip or something new to hit. A red button flashing was flashing as if to taunt him. He slapped the button down but nothing happened. To put it simply; Isaac flipped shit. He only stopped when Silas walked in. It's been rough this past week.
"Dad, she's getting real bad." his vocal chords shook out. He was on the edge. It's hard to be specific of what he was on the edge of. Anger like his father? Breaking down in tears? His hands were visibly shaking as he stood there. Pale white and absolutely frozen in place. Silas didn't want to go back. The thought of that train car haunted them both yet they knew that the only way to deal with loss was face to face. Isaac stumbled over to his son. They hugged and embraced each other more than they ever had in the three years since it all went to shit. Isaac had never seen it take this long, from hours to maybe even a day, nobody had ever taken a whole week to turn. It was time to end it. End the pain. Isaac looked into Silas's eyes. The white of his eyes was instead replaced with a rose red. Tears made the sight hard to withstand. He looked away and guided Silas outside of the conductor car. Slowly they both half-heartedly worked their way back.
Outside of the freight car they paused. Isaac reached behind and put his hand on the handle of the .357 tucked between his belt and jeans. His eyes began to burn as they wanted so badly to let go of the tears. He released the handle and looked at Silas. Silas refused to do anything but give the train car a thousand yard stare. Isaac reached out and yanked on his arm, desperate to drag him back to reality. His attempts were in vain however, as Silas remained in his trance and held his place. There was no moving him. Isaac threw open the train car and hopped inside. The doctor was in the corner, head buried in his hands. Isaac's eyes darted between him and Renee. "You can go now." his voice stiff and emotionless. The doctor slowly got to his feet and shuffled off, dragging his feet. Silas didn't move still, not even to look at the doctor.
"Isaac..." Renee whispered with a mix of mumbling. It was almost inaudiable. He rushed, practically falling to her side.
"I'm so sorry." He said, his stern and emotionless voice now giving way to cracks.
"It's," a deep breath interrupted her, "okay."
Isaac raised his hand to her forehead to feel for the fever. Instead of being greeted by the usual dampness of sweat he found that she was rather cold.
"How do," he paused, "How do you want to go, baby?" the sweetness in his voice was reminiscent of all the good moments in their life. Their first hug, first kiss, their first dance, their marriage, Silas's birth, the make up after their arguments. All of that love and sweetness showed up just in time. At the end.
"Baby? You, haven't, called me," she was coughing her words up and paused to cough the blood out of her throat. She started again. "You haven't called me," Once again interrupted by a deep breath, "that in a while."
Her breathing was getting more and more coarse, accompanied by irregular sounds.
"Save, the, bullet." She whispered. "I'll... Be... Gone... Soon... Any... Ways..." She was pausing between each word to catch a breath. Tears trailed down both of their cheeks. Isaac slid down behind her and rested her back against his chest, she could look up at him. He could still see the ocean in her eyes. He wrapped his arms around her. This was something they both hadn't felt in a long time. All of the arguments they had just seemed to fade in this moment and they knew nothing but love and fear. Love for each other; fear for what was to come.
"You know I never stopped loving you right?" Isaac questioned.
"I... know." her raspy voice was practically wheezing out the words. "Forever, " she breathed in heavily, "and Always." Mustering up the strength to raise her hand and hold out her pinky for the very familiar pinky promise they had always made to each other. Isaac wrapped his pinky around hers and with his crying becoming straight up sobbing, mumbled to her.
"Forever and always, baby." He leaned down and kissed her ice cold forehead.
They laid there together for what seemed to be an eternity. It felt like time had stopped just for them. He held her tight in one arm and held his pinky in hers. He could barely feel her breathing. As a matter of fact it felt like she wasn't breathing at all but he held on to her nonetheless. Time passed and Silas never once entered the train car, afraid of the sight he would see.
...Renee's body seemed to be moving, but still not breathing. It was sunset now. The sky had turned from the light blue to the fading red and yellow. Her eyes began moving underneath the eye lids and flashed open. They revealed something Isaac did not want to see. Those eyes, the ones he had seen love and the ocean in before, were not the same. The familiar blue had been glossed over, and appeared gray and dead. She was gone. Isaac, tightening his grip on her arms, thought to himself. This isn't her anymore. This isn't her anymore. This isn't her anymore. He had to keep telling himself that. Even muttering it out loud to make the thought cut deeper. He unwrapped his pinky from hers and reached for his knife. Isaac flipped out the blade and held the tip to its temple. He slowly pushed in and it had stopped moving. "I'm sorry baby." he whimpered and as he got up he gently laid the body back down. His mind was scrambled. "FUCK!" he shrieked and punched the side of the train car. He hopped out and looked around.
Silas was nowhere to be found.
