The Good, The Bad, and The Dirty

This is Gospel

Apparently Zola meant to remove my hand. It was swiftly amputated. Swift but like no pain I've ever felt in my life.
I screamed and screamed for ages even after my hand was removed. But Arnim Zola didn't even tell me to shut up. He seemed to enjoy my screams of agony. And the pain didn't end there. Zola began attaching something to the end of my arm.
"See your real hand would have had to have been removed anyway but most likely not replaced so I'm giving you another hand a better one." Zola explained. I didn't stay awake long enough however to see this new hand.
But I figured my real hand would have to be removed. I hadn't treated it and it probably had become infected.
  I was awakened to more pain. Shocker. This I was no longer in the lab or that cyrofreeze thingy. This room was very large and had better lighting than the others but sadly just as dull. It looked like some kind of training facility. A large glass wall separated me from the control room were Arnim Zola sat watching me closely.
"Good you're awake." He drawled in his stupid accent, "try to move your wrist please on your left hand."
I looked down at my new left hand. It wasn't scarred or bloody at all. In fact it looked just like my original hand. There were long angry cuts on my wrist though where the new hand met my wrist.
I noticed the engagement ring Bucky gave me cleaned and glinting brightly on my ring finger. I found this strange. I had thought for sure HYDRA wouldn't let me keep it.
"Why did you let me keep my ring?" I asked holding it up for him to see.
"For it to be a constant reminder of what you had which is gone now leaving you to question if it was even real." Zola said simply.
Horror struck. He obviously meant Bucky. I feared the worst. "You didn't kill him did you?" I asked I tried to sound furious but my voice came out more like a whimper.
Arnim Zola noticed and smirked. "Well we killed Sergeant Barnes yes."
Fury overcame me. I tried to scream but it came out more like a mangled sob of a dying animal.
"Do as we ask and we will not harm you." Zola said ignoring my pain.
"How can I? You've already hurt me! You've done the worst thing you could have ever done. Cut off my limbs, burn me, smack me, whatever that's nothing like losing the people you love. And you wouldn't know cause you're just Schmidt's pet!" I spat.
The last part of my words seemed to sting Zola a little. He flared in rage.
"I am no ones pet!" He shrieked.
"You can tell yourself that as much as you want but that doesn't make it true. Just like I can tell myself forever Bucky isn't dead but that won't bring him back."
"Shut up and do as I asked!" Zola shrieked.
I hung my head only half pleased with teasing him. "Please stop shouting it sounds more like angry squeaking of an ensnared mouse."
This only succeeds in making him yell more. Guards came and took me back to a filthy cell with nothing in it. Just a bare floor or sea of dirt as I like to call it.
At least it had a small light hanging from the ceiling.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
To be honest I don't know how much time passed. Let's just agree it was a lot and move on.
Zola has been trying to get me to test out my new hand and so called powers almost everyday for hours on end. I don't even respond with snooty comments anymore. I don't have the heart. I had become only an empty shell or blank slate of the person I was.
Bucky was dead. Zola said so. And it was my fault. At least when he fell off the train there was a possibility he was alive but now who's to say HYDRA didn't just let him bleed to death. He had lost his arm, Zola and the rest of HYDRA spoke nothing of him at all like he didn't exist. All I had left was my ring and his dog tags of war.
  My grief and depression have made me completely unresponsive and dead on the inside which has infuriated Zola. He had beaten and screamed at me only to get no response. I was so depressed about Bucky I almost didn't feel the physical pain.
  "Rise." An agent barked at me. I just sat there. He kicked me in the ribs.
  "I said rise." He spat. I did nothing. Sighing angrily he kicked me again and then raised my chin to force me to look into his eyes.
  "You might want to come with me this time princess. There's something or more like someone you might like." He told me.
  Slowly and painfully I rose. I was roughly dragged down a hallway before reaching a room with a strange machine with an uncomfortable looking black leather chair under it. In the chair sat a really built man with long shaggy light brown hair that hung over his face.
  I couldn't see his face cause his head was bent down and he seemed to be hiding.
  "Asset look up!" The agent commanded. The man rose his head. He had little uneven stubble on his chin, icy cold but beautiful charming blue eyes that screamed for help, and a solemn look on his face.
  He was almost unrecognizable but I knew exactly who he was.