Up With The Sauce

Aphonous

It's hard to imagine what is seen, by those without sight.

I have loved.
Trusted.
Believed.
And lost.

Pain is like a symphonic melody that I can't get out of my head. The cuts and bruises like a majestic violin. Beautiful notes, plastered across the sky for the world to see. Loss and abandonment: the perfect silence between the powerful beats of a drum. A melody as sweet and sorrowful as yellow roses.

Deception fell from her lips like a bitter molasses.

Moonlight butterflies darted in front of the conceptual constellations that she painted with her imagination.

She was to be a ballerina.

Always dancing.

Dancing.

Dancing...

to the symphony of life.

The ghost of her, is like a vanilla whisper on my skin. I still feel her long black braids, tickling my chest. I still see her pale green eyes on the backs of my eyelids like an image that's burned into a television screen. Sometimes, it's hard to believe that she was real.

She silenced the constantly flowing images of distraction and destruction in my head like nightfall silences the sun.
Where my eyes were an empty stage, waiting, she turned off the vacancy, and filled them with a slideshow of reasons.

She was art and artful.

Art, not because she was attractive, art isn't supposed to be, but art, because she was honest, raw, and meaningful.

Artful were the lies she spewed.

She said

"Always."

She was everything. She was forever.

I lost.

She faded like ink on dampened parchment, and my world crashed like a car going 80 off a steep cliff. Everything froze.

The Banach-Tarski Paradox suggests that it's possible to create a secondary sphere just as perfect and whole as the sphere it came from.

I believed it.
Until I didn't.

Infinity is still infinity no matter how much you take away. So I still have forever... Just not HER forever. A forever without her.

But that isn't right, it couldn't be.

How can the world be the same without her, without love, without silence and music? Or sorrow and laughter?
How can infinity remain infinite without MY infinity?

I refuse to believe that the world can be same without that special person. Without life. Without her.

Now
Infinity is just infinity takeaway one.
Music is just noise.
Stages are just elevated places for dust to dance in remembrance of what was.
Eyes are like Niagara.
The world is still infinite, but without meaning.

I know what it means to lose...

and my lips are sealed.