Roommates

Milwaukee

Four
Mid-September

"How has your family background impacted the way you see the world?" It's the first of three essay questions I must complete for this study abroad scholarship I'm applying for. I have been staring at the blank page for fifteen minutes, my mind blank. I don't have much positive to say about my 'family background', and while there is plenty of negative to choose from, I don't want to write about any of it. I guess I can find some way to spin my mother's death into something that prompted character growth or whatever. It makes me feel a little sick to think of using the loss of my mother to my financial advantage like this, but I'm certainly not going to write about Marcus.

I start to put pen to paper, still not sure where to start, when I'm saved by a knock at the door. I am not usually one to procrastinate, but this time, I'm happy to. When I open the door, Christina invites herself in, brushing past me.

"Hey, babe," she smiles as she sits down on a barstool at the kitchen counter. "Have time for an early dinner before I go to work?"

"A quick one," I agree. "I'm going to Milwaukee for the weekend, remember?"

She frowns. "Oh yeah, I forgot." She looks me up and down, and that frown doesn't go away. "You're not wearing that, are you?"

I look down at my clothes. I'm not sure what's bothering her; I'm just wearing black basketball shorts and a t-shirt, along with some running shoes. It's all clean, doesn't have any stains or look worn out, why is this a problem? It's just the dining hall! "Uh... yes, Christina, this is in fact what I am planning to wear. It's just the dining hall, can you chill out please?!" She's getting on my nerves. I get tired of how focused she is on her 'image'. As much as I didn't like Eric putting my girl down, if I'm being honest, he hit the nail on the head when he referred to her as high-maintenance.

Her eyes land on the application I was working on and her frown deepens as she looks it over. "What the hell is this?" she hisses.

What is she going on about now? "It's a scholarship application... is that not clear from the page's heading?" I say slowly.

Christina rolls her eyes. "Of course it is. It says it's for a study abroad program. You've already got it half filled out! What happened to our plan of staying in Chicago?!"

"Calm down, Chris, I--"

"Don't tell me to calm down, Four! How can you plan on just leaving me behind like this?! For what is it-- a whole year?! You know I can't go-- I have that internship all lined up, here in Chicago, like we talked about, and it's perfect!" Her cheeks are red and her fists are clenched. If a look could kill you, I'd be dead right now.

It's true that we talked about both staying in Chicago, but this opportunity hadn't come up at the time, and I really want it. My mother was from London; I have family there who I have never met, people who could tell me more about her. I was only nine years old when she died. "I have a lot of reasons for wanting this, Christina, and it's an amazing opportunity. I probably won't even get it, but can't you just be supportive of me?!" My voice is rising, I am almost yelling. "Fuck, Chris, can it not always be all about you? Sometimes it gets a little old playing the supporting actor on the goddamn Christina Show!"

"Fuck you, Four!" she spits, slinging her purse over her shoulder. "Forget that dinner and go on home to your daddy. I don't want to see your face any more this weekend anyway!" Her footsteps are heavy and loud on her way to the door, and when it slams behind her, my only regret is that I didn't get the satisfaction of kicking her out and slamming the door myself.