Young, Gay, Love

- Summer -

   Hey guys and girls, I'm back. It's crazy to see so many people were affected by my story. That time of my life was one of the darkest valleys I have ever treaded through and here we are five years later. Stronger, wiser, braver... So much has changed and a lot of you mentioned to me how inconsistent my story was and I apologize. To be honest, that time of my life was incredibly unstable and that was because I felt so numb I just wanted to feel something. And guess what? I did feel something but at the expense of hurting many people around me. There was an aftermath and that resulted in me losing almost everyone involved in my coming out story.

   So here I am to tell you what happened afterwards. Despite me losing the people who shaped who I am today, I found something not better, but like a second chance. I, myself, just like the cycle of the seasons, I experienced Rebirth.

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    "Singing Radiohead at the top of my lungs! With the boombox blaring' as we're falling' in love. Gotta bottle of whatever but it's getting' us drunk. Singing' Here's to Never Growin' Up!!"

   My car windows were all rolled down as I was singing my heart out to the hit of the summer. I was on my way home from college and I was flying high because I just told my school counselor that I was not coming back in the fall to continue my degree in Business Management. With all my things packed, I was contemplating how I was going to tell my parents that I was moving back in... Matter of fact... how long was I going to stay at my parents house? I was just pulling into the driveway and I see my parents standing by the doorway with a welcome back home sign and one balloon.

   "Hey Mom! Hey Dad!" I was just opening the car door and my mom was already there embracing me in a bear hug.

   "I missed you so much son! How was school? Did you make any new friends? Was the drive okay-"

   "What she means to say, we missed you and we are happy you are home."

    My dad has always been the one  who interrupted my mom's longwinded ramblings and it made me laugh because she always glared at him while he just laughed.

   "My drive was good, I didn't make any friends and I'm hungry. Is there any food prepared or do I have to eat another bowl of ramen?"

   "No need for ramen there is food at the table. We can eat whenever you are ready" my mom just smiled with watery eyes. I knew she missed me and she's been worried for me ever since I was raped by Merkley.

   "I think I'm just going to drop my bags off in my room and then we can eat is that okay?" I asked.

   "That's fine, just holler when you're ready." My dad said with the same smile my mom was wearing.

   I grabbed my bare essentials from my trunk and made my way to my old bedroom. The room was still painted pastel blue and the view to my vast 25 acre backyard hasn't changed a bit. My old piano was pushed to the back and my bed was sitting by my window. It was bare but I liked it. Even though I was returning home, it felt like a genuine chance to start over. I looked over at my closet and saw one box overflowing with pictures, trinkets, and old notebooks... Wow... there were pictures of me and the gang, Zayn's old love letters, songs I wrote and my HS Yearbook. So much has changed in 5 years and I can't remember the last time I spoke to the people who I used to talk to everyday. In fact, I can't remember the last time I felt like I had someone I could talk to...

   "Hey there Pookie!"

   I felt a slap on my back and without having to turning around I could already feel his big ole smile.