I stared mindlessly out the window of the blank, lifeless room. There were no pictures on the wall. There were no bright colors. The only color that appeared was a pale white. You could tell whoever was in here before me hated it just as much as I did. It had been scraped and picked at like whoever was before me was looking for something better. The fact that I had to even be here in the first place frustrated me. I guess it really didn't matter where I was at this point. No one cared anyways. I pushed away anyone that remotely cared about me a long time ago. That's why depression is so vicious. It tears apart who you are as a person, strips away any feeling of life you may have had, and isolates you from the people who you care about the most. A knock suddenly interrupted my thoughts.
"Kaden?"
I turned my head without speaking to face whoever entered the room.
"I'm Nicole. I'll be your nurse from seven a.m to seven p.m. We'll be seeing a lot of each other."
I nodded my head towards her. I acknowledged her presence that's really all she could ask of me right now. I wasn't trying to make friends here.
"Dinner is in about ten minutes if you're feeling up for it."
I just looked at her. Now was my time to study her. I always did this when meeting people which is probably half the reason why I had no friends. I wanted to get a good read on people. I wanted to know if it was safe to trust them. Nicole was barely over five feet tall. She had slick black hair pulled up neatly into a bun. She wasn't very old. Her skin was the perfect creme colored. I had to admit...she was pretty. I shook my head like I was physically getting rid of the thoughts. Being attracted to the nurse was the last thing I needed in my life.
"Thank you," I managed to stutter out.
She beamed at me like she was pleased I said something. Her teeth were almost so white they were blinding. I turned away to let her know I was done.
"Let me know if you need anything, Kaden."
I winced as the words left her mouth. That statement sounded oh too familiar.
"Let me know if you need anything, Kaden."
That was the last thing one of my best friend's ever said to me. That was over a year ago. It's funny how people say they want to help you until they realize what they may be getting themselves into. People's problems get too messy and your problems just add to that pile of debris.
"Kaden..."
The nurse's voice rang in my ears pulling me out of my thoughts. I whipped my head around to stare at her. She was much closer than before. She was looking at me like she thought I might break. It was the same look that everyone gave me anymore. I may be five foot eleven, former football player, and a heavy weight lifter, but I could easily be broken just like anyone else.
"Your face got really pale. I thought you were going to be sick."
I ran my right hand through my mess of blonde curly hair, a nervous habit I picked up on. A slight smile crossed her features. She motioned beside of me questioning if she could sit down. I managed a half smile. She was trying I'll give her that.
"You know i'm not that much older than you. I'm twenty four."
I nodded. I was still deciding if I could trust her or not.
"I'm here for moral support."
She was the first person who was talking to me like I was a normal human being. I am at a mental health rehabilitation center but I'm far from crazy.
"Out of everyone in this entire building I promise you can trust me the most."
I nodded letting this new information sink in. This still didn't change the fact that I didn't belong here. I didn't belong anywhere for that matter.
"Hang in there sweetie. We aren't the bad guys."
I thought about her last statement as she got off the bed and made her way towards the door to leave me in my thoughts. I stared out the window again. They weren't the bad guys. The real villains were the venomous thoughts keeping me captive inside my head.
YOU ARE READING
The Monster
Fanfiction"They weren't the bad guys. The real villains were the venomous thoughts keeping me captive inside my head." Kaden seeks desperately to find himself again when his life is taken over by his depression. The people that are thrown into his life help...