Secrets

Chapter 1

Chapter one

"Where the hell is it?" I mutter, rummaging through my closet for my new tank top. I just bought it last week for the family party today. "I swear I put it in here. Mom!"
"Yes, Raels?" She pokes her head in the doorway to my room. I smile at the nickname, remembering who gave it to me. Mom's hand automatically flies to her neck, the gold P in between her fingers.
"Do you know where I put my new tank top? I swear it was in my closet!"
"You sure you put it there?" She asks, walking into the room, her heels clicking against the hardwood floor. "And not with your dirty work clothes?"
"Now why would I do that?" I snort, but walk over to my dirty laundry basket.
"You did it last week," she laughs, crossing her arms over her chest. Rolling my eyes, I search through my dirty clothes, throwing them out of the hamper and onto the floor.
"It has to be here somewhere!" I yell, catching my towel around my body before it falls.
"Just wear one of your other tops," my mother says, walking over to my closet. "Like this one! It looks good on you." She smiles, holding up a white boyfriend tank top.
"Fine," I snatch it from her hands.
"Lose the attitude, Raelynn," her voice is stern as she follows me out of my room and into the hallway.
I know she means it since she used my real name. Turning on my heel, I give her a goofy grin. My way of letting her know I'm sorry.
My mother just shakes her head, and smiles as she heads downstairs. Dragging myself back to the bathroom, I start getting ready.
After putting on my jean shorts and white tank top, I dry my dark brown hair with my towel. The same color as my mother's, but different than my older sister Natalie and older brother Bennett.
I've always been different from them, and not just because they are 23 and 22, while I'm only 20.
Sighing, I start putting my makeup on, covering the scar I have on my left cheek. I don't remember much about how I got it, but it's there to remind me of Poppy everyday.
She would've been 15 by now.
Shaking my head, I quickly finish my makeup, and put my hair in a pony tail.
"Are you almost done in there, railroad?!" Natalie bangs on the door. I roll my eyes at the nickname. According to her, Raels, which is pronounced rails, is stupid unless it has the word road after it.
Opening the door, I see her standing there, smirking at me. She has my new tank top on.
"What the hell, Natalie!" I yell, pointing at my shirt.
"Don't leave it sitting out," she laughs, walking past me into the bathroom. She slams the door before I get a chance to answer.
"Bitch," I mutter, making my way downstairs.
I can't wait until she leaves her college at the end of summer.
"What Raels?" Mom lifts her head up from what she's doing as I walk into the kitchen. Pulling my bottom lip in between my teeth, I shake my head.
My siblings and I never agree on anything, except not telling our mother when we fight. We know it would upset her since the last thing she ever said to one of her sisters before she died was, I hate you.
"Nothing Mom," I give her a smile.
She smiles back, looking down at the cheese tray she was working on.
"When's everyone comin?" I ask, leaning on the kitchen Island to get a cube of cheese.
"Brian said they'd be here around one, one-thirty," she eats a cube of cheese herself. "Jenny texted me and said they're on their way about an hour ago. I don't know about your grandmother, haven't heard from her."
"What about Dad's side?"
"I think Scott and them are here now," she shrugs, leaning back against the sink.
Ever since I can remember, we've always had a huge family party at the start of summer. Mom and Dad's brothers and sisters come down, bringing their kids with them.
"Oh god, that means," I gulp. "Trevor is here."
"Raelynn!" Mom says sternly, but still laughs. "That's not very nice."
"I can't help it! He's weird!"
"Who's weird?" Dad walks in the kitchen.
"You," Mom giggles.
"Me?" He stops in his tracks, shocked by what she just said. Then he smiles, walking over to her. "You're the one who married me," he smirks, tickling her.
"Jaxson, stop!" Mom laughs, wiggling her way out of Dad's grasp. She fixes her dress as he kisses her forehead.
"You both are weird," I look at the two of them. They both laugh at me.
"Yeah yeah," Dad chuckles, squashing Mom between him and the sink while he washes his hands. "I think Mia and Mason are here. Heard the car while we were out working on the bike."
"You two and that damn motorcycle," Mom squirms against him. "Are you ever going to even ride it?"
Dad shrugs, leaning down to kiss her. Even with her heels on, she still only comes up to his chin.
"Yup," I hop down from the stool. "I'm out."
"Tell Jenny I'm-" she squeals, interrupted by Dad's hands on her hips and his face in her neck.
"I'll tell her you're in here!" I shout, walking out the sliding glass door and onto the back porch.
"Raels!" I hear as I'm shutting the door.
My lips curl up at the sound of her voice.
The only reason I can ever survive family gatherings.
"Mia!" I turn around just as she collides into me. "Oh thank god! I thought I was going to be left alone!"
"Nope!" She smiles, letting me go.
If we weren't cousins, people would think we were sisters we look so much alike. Expect she has brown eyes and I have green.
I have never thought that, only because she is so much prettier than I am. Her tan, flawless skin lets her pull off any type of outfit she wants. Like the flower pattern romper she has on now.
Glancing down at my outfit, I bite my bottom lip, wishing I could pull something off like that.
Quickly shaking my head, I smile back up at her. She grabs my hand, leading me over to the table lined with food.
"Where's Mason?" I ask, taking a carrot from the veggie plate.
"Who knows where that loser is," Mia rolls her eyes.
"Aren't twins suppose to, like, know where the other one is?"
"Ha ha-"
"I don't want to know where she is!" A deep voice laughs behind us. The guy version of Mia walking up the steps. His bright white smile, brown eyes, and dark hair is the exact same as Mia's.
"Shut the hell up, Mason!" Mia shouts, crossing her arms over her chest.
Mason laughs, walking over and pulling me into a hug.
Standing on my tiptoes in my old, navy converse, I rest my chin on his shoulder as I hug him back. One difference between these two, Mason is 6'1", and Mia is more my height, 5'7".
Opening my eyes, my heart drops at the person behind him. His dark hair slicked back, showing off his sparkling green eyes and perfect jawline.
Lucas.
Our eyes meet, but he quickly glances away, scratching the back of his neck.
I haven't see him since we broke up, two months ago.
Letting go of Mason, I turn around to Mia.
"I'm sorry," she mouths, grabbing my hand, pulling me after her.
"Forgot he'd be coming," I sigh as we walk towards the garage.
"I told Mason not to bring him, but you know he doesn't listen."
Lucas is Mason's best friend.
And my ex-boyfriend.
"I didn't realize how much I've missed him."
"Oh Raels," Mia gives me a sad smile.
Shaking my head, I put on my best fake smile.
"Where's your-"
"Raels!" Aunt Jenny yells, walking to where Mia and I are. She holds her arms out for a hug.
She's always been my favorite aunt.
"Mom's in the kitchen," I hug her. "Told me to tell you that."
"Jaxson in there too?"
I nod as she lets me go.
"I think I'll wait to go in there," Aunt Jenny laughs. "Don't want to interrupt anything!"

It doesn't take long before the rest of the family shows up. Which is our que to leave. Mia and I take off to my old, abandoned play set in the backyard, talking about whatever comes to mind.
"I'm honestly shocked Lucas came," Mia blurts out, swinging on her swing. "After what he did to you," she shakes her head. "I didn't think he had the balls to show up,"
I just chuckle, looking down at my feet on the swing next to her. "I mean what a dick move! Don't cheat on someone and then show up like nothing happened!"
"Mia, it's fine," I sigh, looking up at her. "It's not like I love him anymore."
The look on her face tells me she knows I'm lying.
"Raelynn-"
"Hey railroad!" Natalie calls from the porch, Bennett smirking next to her. "Time to eat!"
Mia gives me a sad smile as she jumps off her swing.
Dad and Bennett set up a huge table right behind the porch, Mom and aunt Jenny are bringing the food there when we walk up.
"Oh come on, Alexandra!" Aunt Jenny laughs. "You know it's true!"
They almost look like twins for a second.
Mom shakes her head, setting a plate of burgers and hot dogs Dad must have cooked on the grill.
Aunt Jenny looks over our way, smiling when she sees me.
"Hi," she mouths. "You okay?" She tilts her head towards Lucas, who's sitting next to Mason.
I've told her more about what happened than anyone else.
Nodding, I sit down next to Mia, two down from Lucas.
Once everyone is seated, the food starts being passed around. At some point while eating, I catch Lucas looking at me. He gives me a small smile. I quickly look away, not returning the smile.
I can't stand looking at him anymore.
"Excuse me," I mutter, getting up from the table. I doubt anyone heard with all the laugher going on, but I don't care.
Running into the house, I climb the stairs two steps at a time. Reaching my room, I slam the door behind me, but it doesn't shut.
"Raels," I hear behind me. Lucas. "Can we talk?"
"I don't want to talk to you, Luke," I cringe at myself for using his nickname. "I mean Lucas."
"You can still-"
"No," I spin around, facing him. "I can't."
The look on his is nothing but hurt. Bitting my bottom lip, I look away from him before I start crying. Being this close, my body aches for him.
"Can we talk, please?" He begs, his voice cracking on the e.
"I don't want to hear your bullshit," I push past him, walking out of my room.
"Raels," he pleads, right on my heel.
Ignoring him, I make my way downstairs, and back outside. Mom and uncle Scott have already started cleaning up.
"Raels, please," Lucas jogs catching up to me.
Mom hears him and looks up at us.
"Raelynn!" She calls. I turn around and look at her, watching her wave me over.
Glancing over my shoulder at Lucas, I see his eyes go wide, and he runs towards me.
"Look out!" He screams, tackling me to the ground. I start pushing him off when I hear an explosion to my left.
Lucas covers me with his body, but I can still see it.
Can still see the car burst into flames as it collides with the shed.
And hear the ear piercing scream come from aunt Jenny as she goes with it.