Eggs at Noon

Sunnyside Up

My name is Sasha Jones and this is not your typical teen adventure or coming of age story. I do not know what kind of story my story is. I do not know why anyone would want to be interested in my life, but here I am all smiles everyday with a fake outlook that everyone knows. I hate that I have to put a smile just like how normal girls my age put on makeup every morning. My mom always tells me to keep an upbeat attitude and smile even if there is not anything to smile about. She says that optimism is catching even if you're faking it. I do not get it one bit and I hate the way some people are super fake, but they are just trying to cover up their own insecurities. I am not excluded from this and I know I have flaws and a few insecurities of my own and I am working on them.

I am a freshman at Hellman High in Daffodil, Arizona where everyone wants to be in everyone's business and no one has a filter. Yeah, it is a lovely rural small town and if you want to see a movie you have to drive an hour out to the next major city to see it. My mom and I go once a month on the weekends to see a couple of flicks and make a day out of it. My goals so far is to graduate and get an art scholarship to go to Stanford to finally live with my long distance internet boyfriend. Well, that is what I tell people and to tell you the truth I do not have a real goal...or a boyfriend. I'm going to tell you something about myself and that is that I lie. I lie a lot, but not of the mean, hurtful, or vicious kind. I lie to get out of things like when the school counselors ask what you want to do after high school. If I tell them I really did not know or if I told them I wanted to do nothing and collect dust they would probably have me talk to the school psychologist.

Okay, let me explain that one and you'll want to hear this one. My sister died in a car crash six years ago when I was nine. A year after that my father left and we haven't heard from him since and mom will not talk about it. So as you can guess I've been to a few school psychologists, therapists, and psychiatrists since then so if I display the slightest discontent they refer me to one of those people. The biggest reason why I fake an optimistic outlook in fear of having to be dragged into a doctor's office to talk about my feelings. I might talk about my sister's death at a later time, but I do not want to keep hashing it out over and over again. I still see a psychiatrist and his name is Dr. Moody and tries to break the ice in every session with making fun of his own name and profession.

Anyway, I mostly think about what I am suppose to do in life. Do I have a greater purpose or is the goal in life is to be born, make a few contributions to society, and then death can claim you at any point whether you are done or not. I get most of my school work done, but I am really apathetic about it. I only get it done to get my mom and my teachers off my back about my grades. Also, I would be a total hermit and introvert if I had not joined the track team. At first I did it to make it appear like I had an interest in something and maybe some school spirit. In reality it actually make me feel free when I run. I actually tell people that I run to burn the crazy off and some people laugh, giggle, and then there are the people that look at me funny. I do not care what people think and that includes my family.

When I get home I am free to unscrew the smile from my face...unless it is a track day and in that case those days are on Tuesdays and Thursdays after school. Those are the only days I come home with an actual smile on my face like sunnyside up eggs. You can not go wrong with sunnyside up eggs for breakfast. Mondays and Wednesdays I study in the library for only necessary studying. Fridays I come straight home and relax with a snack and write in my journal and then get ready for my appointment with Dr. Moody. Since starting track I have been feeling better enough to only see the doctor once a week instead of twice a week. Then mom and I go and get take out from the chinese restaurant across the street from the doctor's office and bring it home and talk about our week.

My mom is a writer and an editor at the local newspaper and it does not pay much. That is why she has a second job at night and on the weekends at the local diner across the street from our house. The name of it is Millie's Diner on Oak Street and they have really good burgers and strawberry milkshakes. I usually order a bacon cheeseburger with crinkle fries and a strawberry shake when I go there sometimes after studying in the school library. On Saturdays at noon I always order eggs and toast with some orange juice. Sometimes when I feel like it I might forgo the toast and order waffles, but eggs are always my favorite to have for breakfast or brunch.

I have friends in the normal fashion that any teenager has friends. I interact with my classmates and I sit at the jock table during lunch. I do not say much and just chew my food, nod my head, smile, and laugh at the appropriate times when one of the guys on the football team makes a joke. Although, my laughter is real every time someone makes fun of the cafeteria food or one of our teachers. Not all the teachers are bad at this school and I do enjoy my English class with Mrs. Hanson. On the track team I am friends with some of the girls and the others I am just friendly with because they are my teammates. One of my track team friends, Kristen Kenny, has long auburn hair, running legs of a goddess, and blue eyes like the sky. Sometimes I am jealous especially on the days she beats my time when we train. She is equally jealous that I can eat whatever and as much as I want without gaining a pound. We hang out sometimes on Saturdays or after training.

That is the basics of my life and I do not care whether you believe me or not. I only lie to get out of things remember? My life is not all that bad and it's more like that it is boring and getting stale. If I was not on the track team at school I think I really would go crazy. You know how you wish for something and then people caution you to be careful what you wish for? Yeah, I wished for things to become more exciting in my life. So life seemed to be getting better as I thought up of my new happier motto of keeping everything "Sunny side up". Because just like my eggs every Saturday afternoon I want to keep everything sunny side up. If I keep saying that and thinking that over and over again I do not have to go to that dark place anymore. I thought all the bad stuff was behind me until I was walking home one day from studying and decided to go to Millie's and order some food and that's when I saw him. He is sitting at the counter, on the stool, and talking to my mother. She did not look happy and I just stood there in the diner entry way gawking at my long lost father. I felt my lunch crawling back up from my stomach and threatened to escape. My heart started racing and I felt my breathing getting scarce...my life felt not so sunny side up anymore.