We Can't Save Ourselves

Chapter 3: Day 2; Ryan

I woke up to a bunch of brown hair in my face. I almost sneezed, but I held it back. I slowly sat up, pulling my arms away from Daniel. He groaned and opened his eyes. I brought my arms up and tried to rub the sleep from mine. I yawned and looked at Daniel. He just looked sad. His hair was usually neat and tidy, but now it was just a mess. His eyes were red and puffy, further evidence that he had been crying. His clothes were wrinkled, and his lips were cracked. I sighed.

"Morning."

"Yeah, it is." He said sleepily. Damn, his morning voice was sexy. I glanced around the large open room. People were sleeping almost everywhere, all against the walls and in groups. A few of them were already up and wandering around. I watched Hannah check her phone, then set it on the ground and put her head in her hands. I slowly got up from the floor, and moved to the far side of the barn wall, where there was a large door. I didn't understand it's purpose, but I opened it anyway. Sunlight streamed through the opening, illuminating the room even more than the dirty windows. The sun had barely risen above the horizon, and I guessed it was probably about seven in the morning.

"What are you doing?" Zach whisper-yelled at me from the ladder. Only his head stuck above the floor.

"Letting in the goddamn light." I replied in a normal voice. Then I yawned again.

"People are still sleeping." He whisper-yelled again.

"I don't care." I said, walking toward him. He climbed fully onto the floor, and stood in front of me. "We need to eat what we can, then we need to move, find someplace safer."

"This place is safe." He said, trying to be intimidating, but it was hard since I was probably at least four inches taller than him.

"For now." I said. "But what happens when we don't have food? Or when those things show up again?" Zach didn't say anything for a second.

"Fine." He relented. "I'll start getting people up. We should be able to leave in an hour."

"Good." I then began moving around the room, nudging people with my feet, waking them up. A lot of them gave me crabby looks, but I ignored it. I got about halfway through when the noise of everyone started to wake people up on their own. I looked at a mirror hanging on the I walked over to it, and stared at my reflection. There was dried blood on my cheek, and my hair stuck up in several spots. There was a bruise on my temple where I had hit the seat. I looked at my hands. They were covered with small cuts from the window. I remembered the window. The only reason I got out was because of Evan. When the bus hit the tree, my body drove Evan's head into the window, which all but shattered it. I killed him. I shivered and rubbed the blood from my face, and tried to wash my hands with a dusty rag.

The bus crash felt like a million years ago. A lot had happened since then, and I felt disconnected. I knew for my own sake, and everyone else's, I couldn't be bothered by what had happened. I had to be strong, so I could save them.

I never had a strong connection with my family. My mom was always working, and when she was home, she was always bitching about random stuff, and how it was my fault and how I never helped her out around the house. She annoyed me, but I loved her anyway, because she was my only mother. She divorced my father three years after my brother was born. My brother was just a pain in my ass, and I had wished he was dead, but the reality that both of them had probably become a snack hadn't kicked in yet. My Dad was a pothead. He was angry, and he was mean. I hated him. I stopped seeing him after I turned 13. Good riddance. I didn't have any real friends, because I was "that one kid" that everyone knew, but I never hung out with people outside of school, and that made me sad. I also didn't have a girlfriend, mainly because I was bisexual. Something that didn't matter in the moment unless it pertained to Daniel. Who had just come up behind me with a stick of deodorant.