Babyboy ≫ Phan Au

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I wanna die.
That's all I wanna say and I wanna do.
Everything is horrible and painful. I don't want this life anymore. It's easy being paid for something like this, but when you're sold off to someone, It's worst.
I've never felt bad about myself or ever needed to hurt myself, until now. All I do is cry and stay in bed. It's been 3 weeks now. Chandler enters my room to bring me food and Phil hasn't entered my room since that day or said a word to me.
I hate this mansion, this room, him and I want out. I don't want this anymore. No one has said anything to me and I'm getting tired of waiting for something. The tears only soak my bed and my clothes.
And If I'm sad everyone must know what I feel and should try to he-
KNOCK KNOCK

I don't reply, but they enter anyways so what's the point.
"Dan?" it's the voice of the man who didn't hear my cries. Who just wanted money from me. Who used my feelings to get what he wanted. He called me baby and now it's Dan.
"Dan, I'm sorry" he said standing in front of the door. Now he says it, now he says he is sorry, after I've cried for months.
"I know I'm late, but I am so very sorry" he said sounding slightly sorry, but I can't just accept anything from him.
"I shouldn't of had done that to you, but he... He just wanted to steal everything that was mine." he sobbed
"A-and was I reasonable pay?" I said weakly and stuffy.
"N-Never!! Trust me, Dan, I would never do this to you again." He got closer to me and I won't look at his face.
"I-I don't believe you." I hold back my tears.
"Dan, I hate myself because of what I did to you." He said trying to hold my hand.
"Then why didn't you enter the room, Why?! Why didn't you enter when I cried out your name?!" I said crying like a water fountain I forgot how to hold back tears.
"Dan, I was try, but once I tried the door was locked and I already breaking apart once I heard your cries" He sobbed "I would never let this happen to you again, I know my mistakes and I won't make them again" he said getting on his knees.
He grabbed my hand for the second time. This time I felt neutral. I didn't feel anything special anymore. If anything it felt warm in his grasp. All of his words now bounce off of me, I know what he is saying anymore.

"Dan, please understand that I-I love you" He sobbed
"I'm going to leave" I said stone faced.
"Dan, why do you want that?" he asked wiping his tears.
"I feel like I need that, right now" I stood up and looked down at him.
"Dan, don't do this" he bit his lips looking straight at me. I want to go back to living my regular life and I can't do that with Phil. "Dan, If you want we can stop the whole paying you and name calling?" he begged
"Phil, stop you're not a guy for crying and begging" I said firmly
"You're right" he stands up weakly like a baby deer. "But I can't see you leaving like this, right now."
"Phil, you killed me, by doing nothing"

"THEN WHAT DID YOU WANT ME TO DO?!" he yelled at me
"I DON'T KNOW!! SOMETHING THAT WOULD HAVE STOPPED HIM." I now started yelling at him, making this a yelling competition.
He stared at each other calming are nerves down before we explode the room and people start rushing in.
"Dan, is there anything I can do to fished this?" he asked
"The damaged has been done and you made your choice" I said looking at him "I would like to leave here around tomorrow if you don't mind."
"If that is what you want then that's how it will be" Phil nodded and walked out the door.
I stood there shaking, before I bursted in to tears and feel on the ground. I don't want this anymore. I want to go back to being me and I don't want his money anymore, I'm tired and feel like trash. As long as I leave tomorrow I will be fine. I'll get my life back.