Does He Love Me?

Meeting him

I'm at my dad's for a few days. I don't know what to do. I got my phone taken away almost a year ago, I have no friends here, and I don't have wifi. His girlfriend, Christina wants to go eat somewhere but I don't deserve to eat. "Violet, where do you want to go?" Ughhh why do they feel the need to make me pick? "Uh, how about Olive Garden?" Stupid. All they have is carbs. "Sure, why not?" I hate myself. Why did they have to agree? I walk out to the car and get in the back seat. I fall asleep by the time they get in the car. I haven't eaten in 2 days. I have 0 energy and I just want to go back home. We pass all the lonely-looking faces in the cars next to us. There's a woman about 200 pounds in the car next to us a stop light. She looks at me and I turn my head. I hate when people look at me. We pull up to Olive Garden and I grudgingly get out of the car. I'm only eating a plate, if that. 

We walk in and there's a million people. We wait in line to get our drinks and a group of cute guys walk in. There's one especially though that I have my eye on. Long black hair, skinny as a toothpick. Black band shirt, black jeans, black sweatshirt, black boots. He's perfect. "Hey, look at that kid. He's hot." I say Christina. "Violet, I know him. That's Jared. He used to walk Macy." Jared.. that's a cool name. I want to wave at him, but he'd probably never go for a girl like me. I weigh 103.2 pounds, I'm wearing all black just like him, I have black to silver hair, and I'm just overall disgusting looking. We get our seats and I see that they sit at the table behind us. I get my food. 1 slice of pizza (230 calories) and some mashed potatoes (100 calories). I eat a spoonful of the mashed potatoes. I hate myself so much. He walks past me and I glance up at him. He's so attractive. I slowly eat my food. 

Christina pulls out her phone and I assume she's texting his mom and telling her. "I'm telling Jared's mom that he's here." I'm not surprised. She has talks a lot anyway. "Tell her I think he's hot." I'm totally joking but I wouldn't be surprised if she does tell her. "I just did. She asked if I told him." Oh god please don't tell him. He'd think I'm weird and disgusting. He gets up to get another plate of food. Christina gets up and walks the same way. She's going to tell him. I know it. He walks past me and smiles at me. She told him. She sits back down. "You told him, didn't you?" I say annoyed. "No I just asked if it was him. I haven't seen him in a while." Not sure I believe that but alright. I'm not going to eat the pizza. It doesn't even look good. I hear them getting up. They must be leaving. Well, now I don't want to be here anymore. "Are you done, Violet?" I nod and we leave. We drive to Wal-mart. My mom's there to pick me up. "Violet, do you want his number?" How the hell am I supposed to text him? Besides he doesn't even know me. "It'd be creepy for me to just randomly text him out nowhere." She agrees with me and we finally get to Wal-mart. I see my mom's van. 

I finally go home, take a shower, then go to bed. I wake up in the morning with a message from Christina saying "Hey Jared said he wants to talk to you!! Even if it's just friends, he said you seem cool!" I freaked out and asked for his number. I messaged him from my email. "Yo is this Jared? It's Violet" He got back to me after school. "Yeah this is Jared from the restaurant. Christina said that you think I'm cute so I thought I'd introduce myself." Of course she told him. We start talking a bit. He tells me about his suicidal thoughts and I tell him I'll always be here for him. I ask if he wants to hang out when I go to my dad's this weekend and he agrees. He asks if I want to go to his house. What?? Does he just want to use me? Although I'm hesitant I'll just say yes.