Better Than Revenge [Chapters 1-15 Rewritten]

Chapter 1: Hollywood Tonight

A/N: Some of you may have seen my message about hating the first draft of this story, so this updated version probably doesn't come as a surprise to you. I've edited this several times over the years but here is the most recent version - I hope you guys like it!

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Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying recording or otherwise) of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.

If you didn't bother to read that, just use common sense and don't steal my shit. If it feels like stealing, it probably is. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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Chapter 1: Hollywood Tonight

The last time I saw myself on television, I was eight years old and being featured on America's Funniest Home Videos for my inability to hold down buffalo wings during my debut performance in the Wizard of Oz. People called me the "Vomiting Tree" for months.

Ten years later, I was surprised to see I had inadvertently made a comeback to nighttime television via Hollywood Tonight, your average celebrity gossip show.

A picture of me was the last thing I'd expected to see on a show dedicated to exploiting the lives of those lucky enough to have made it big. God knew I wasn't a celebrity. My five minutes of fame certainly hadn't granted me that title.

Before I could properly react, my picture was gone, replaced by an embarrassing shot of my best friend and me sitting in our seats at our local theater. Tori was ugly-crying, streaks of mascara evident on her cheeks, while I was sporting some seriously crazy eyes and laughing hysterically.

We were on national television, our likeness visible to millions of people, and we both looked absolutely ridiculous. Awesome.

Lacking a reasonable explanation for my latest public humiliation, I stood in the middle of my bedroom and stared at the screen like an idiot, hoping to find some sort of enlightenment.

"Fan-favorite Christian Ryder wanted to show his fans just how much he adores all of them, once again proving he's the sweetest guy ever," the blond host said, smiling widely.

Of course. Of course Christian Ryder was somehow involved. It was just my luck that the one actor I couldn't stand was the one who was somehow involved in my return to the public eye.

Really, my astonishment was foolish. I shouldn't have been surprised. Christian Ryder was the kind of celebrity you couldn't avoid. He was everywhere. He was on the covers of my favorite magazines. He was being featured on my favorite talk shows. His face was plastered in stores nationwide, his merchandise selling surprisingly well. The only product of his that I would ever buy would be Christian Ryder toilet paper, for obvious reasons.

"Last week, Ryder launched a free, nationwide raffle with amazing prizes and goodies, and the results are in," the same host continued, completely oblivious to my inner turmoil.

"But that's not all. This raffle gave Ryder's manager a brilliant idea," her brunette sidekick trilled, because that was the only word I could think of that accurately described the inhuman noise that woman made. "Frank Renaldo wanted to show Ryder just how dedicated and amazing all of his fans are, and with two of his movies out right now, there wasn't a better time. He had secret cameras installed in movie theaters all over the country to show Ryder and the world just how much we love him and his movies!"