In the stars

I never said goodbye

I've had friends, many in fact year 7 was the most broken I've been in my life. Friends come and go I understand but fighting a day crying to sleep then the next day acting like it's fine, is Torturing on my mind let's start from the beginning, ok so as a primary schooler I would cry non stop I didn't care if I was I front of a class, because at the age of 8 my pop died of boule cancer, I was told on holiday and I sat in my tent the rest of the holiday just crying why I wasn't there to say goodbye, most of you will say common it could be worse at least it wasn't your mum or dad the problem is, he cared more about me than my mum and dad combined, he was my father and from that faithful day I have never been the same a death at a young age can really leave a crack in your heart and over years that crack has spread and turned into a shatter I'm shattered broken.

I know cancer is no ones fault but if had not of been on holiday I would have seen him one more time not just on a picture on his coffin. The funeral, was the next thing to dread as my family falls apart I had no idea what to do one minute I wouldn't be able to see my Aunty or uncle because they where at war over some money, so you could say that money ruined our relationship but no, it was us that ruined it, we where too busy thinking about the money we weren't thinking about a 70+ year old man that had a crazy life as a war survivor, I feel this world relies on money more than a life so at this point I was diagnosed with bipolar.