Those Camsten One Shots (Stitchers)

Her Future; My Past

If you're listening to this, then it's too late. I've made my choice. Everyone around me failed. And maybe, in some ways, I failed, too.

No. No. She wouldn't.

But what's done is done. There is no turning back. These are my final words. This is the last story I tell you all.

Tell me I'm hearing this voice wrong. Tell me it isn't her.

My name is Kirsten Clark. I'll repeat that for all of you who just froze in shock. My name is Kirsten Clark. If you're listening to this, it means that either you're on these tapes, or someone didn't follow the rules.

She's dead. I can't possibly be hearing her voice when she is dead.

Right. . . the rules. Very simple. Listen to the tapes. Pass the tapes on to the person who has a tape directly after yours. And if you don't feel like doing it, that's fine. But just know that breaking the rules has consequences - and after all the consequences I suffered through for you, I wouldn't feel like facing that kind of karma.

If you are already reaching to take this tape out, then I can't stop you. No, really, I can't. Like I said, if you're hearing this, we all failed. We all failed. . . to save me. I can try to persuade you. All I ask is you listen. This isn't revenge. This isn't getting even. I had my chance for that - all thirteen times. 

These tapes are a story. Thirteen tales that all lead me to. . . to do what I did. What I haven't done yet. What I have done, if you're listening. Each one of you has a right to know what you did wrong. And now, each one of you will know what thirteen other people did as well. 

I shake a little as I pause the tape. When I got the package in the mail, I thought it might be something sweet, from a friend or my grandmother. I didn't expect this. I didn't expect her. But, then again, I never could "expect" Kirsten. Sighing, I press play again. 

So, without further ado, let's hear tale number one. Liam Granger, you're up.

CKCKCKCKCK

I can't help the tears that slide down my cheek as the last words of tape thirteen go through my head. I try to stifle the sounds of pain I make with a clenched fist against my mouth, but it doesn't help.

This. . . this is it. I'm not sure how to say good-bye. I'm not afraid of. . . of. . . dying, but. . . I never could figure out how to say good-bye. Never.

No, you never could, Kirsten, I think. You never could.

I guess I just want you all to know that I don't hate any of you. I never did. But I'm hurting. I haven't stopped hurting. That's why I'm doing this.

And. . . Cameron. . .

I never thought that this would be her final words to me. I never thought that I would get final words. Real, true, final words.

I love you. Always. Please. . . Don't forget me.

I can hear her crying. Her voice is shaking. It's much too late for me to help her, but I can't help but wish that I could talk to her. I'd say anything to her. Everything. I would have helped her. I wouldn't have left her.

Good-bye.

The tape clicks. I don't bother to take it out yet. My lips are moving without me realizing it. I catch myself before I can fully say that I love her, too.