The Seventh

Chapter 10

Emma was frozen, she couldn't move a muscle. She felt nauseated, it was like looking at a mirror only about 20 years older. She was disgusted by how much she looked like her.
"Alice...you are so beautiful, you've grown so much,,, " She said with tear in her eyes.
"don't call me that" it was weird hearing her own voice like that, it echoed through the room and rang painfully in her ears.
"what?" She was now confused.
"only my family can call me that" she managed the second sentence.
"but I am your family, honey I'm your mother,,, I'm Anna,,, I... "
" I don't have a mother" she interrupted her.
"Honey please let me explain, let me talk to you, I'm your mother" she was pleading again.
"I don't have a mother " Emma repeated louder.
" everyone has a mother, is that what they told you? Let me... "
" I don't have a mother, there was just this woman who gave birth to me and I don't care about knowing her" Emma interrupted her again, this time with a more composed tone.
"you need to leave" She said and stood away and pointed at the door, her whole form was trembling.
"no... no, I won't leave until I can talk to you,,, please, I'm your mother" She begged and cried.
"I don't have a mother, you need to leave" She was in some sort of a loop, staring at the floor with wide eyes, she looked like every drop of blood has left her body.
"that's it, you're leaving, she doesn't want you here, out before I call the cops on you" Till walked towards her but didn't touch her, he just towered over her. "you can't take my child away from me" She yelled.
"No because you did that 15 years ago,  get out of here, I won't repeat myself again" his tone was stone cold and scary.
"This is not finished my child, I promise you" She cried while she was getting out. Till slammed the door and got back to the living room.
He was gonna go to calm his daughter but saw her standing in front of Richard and staring at him. Richard was looking at the ground knowing she heard about him sleeping with Anna.
"you thought I was yours?" She asked him with a low shaky voice.
"Emma... I... " he trailed off.
"Tell me" was all she managed.
He let out a shaky breath and without looking at her, he started talking "Till and Anna broke up when she didn't even know she was pregnant. I was drunk at the local bar when she came to me and told me she's always had a thing for me, She was too young and she was my best friend's ex, and I was drunk out of my head, she begged me to sleep with her,  there's no excuse for what I did but it happened. Couple weeks after that she told Till she was pregnant, naturally I thought the baby was mine, but she was with Till the night before she was with me, that's what I didn't know. She didn't deny or accept it when I asked if I was the father, back then I was too afraid to tell Till about what I did and she kept telling me we shouldn't tell anybody cuz then Till would break our friendship and our career would be in danger. We were at the studio when she went into labor, we were on our way to the hospital when Till asked me to be the godfather, I felt like my heart could get ripped out, I thought I couldn't be the father of my child, but I accepted, thinking you were gonna stay mostly with Anna, we arrived to the hospital only to find out that she's left without a trace whatsoever. To this day I don't know where she went, we never heard from her again. I kept the secret for five years, but then I couldn't anymore, I needed to be able to be known as your real father, so I told Till everything, I'll spare you the bitter details of those days but we finally decided to take a genetic test. That was when I completly broke down. You weren't mine, I was in love with a child that I thought was mine and it got ripped away from me and I... I could never fall out of love with you ,,, you were my child more than my own children ever were, I was there for all your firsts, first time you could sit down, first time you walked or talked, hell I was the first person you spoke to, you called me papa, the joy it gave me was more than I could contain. Now I understand if you hate me but I hope you can see it from my perspective"
He finally went silent and after couple seconds dared to look at Emma. "please say something, liebchen" he pleaded.
"I can't believe you let a stupid genetic test make you think you weren't my papa, blood doesn't make family, you of all people should know that. You're my father as much as dad is and I love you just as much, there's really nothing you can do that can make me hate you, you know? I mean.... You're my Papa,,, I... " She trailed off and looked into his eyes until Richard held her in his arms very tightly and kissed her forhead and her eyelids and her cheeks and a small peck on her lips then hugged her close again without a word. She looked at Till from over Richard's shoulder and answered his smile shyly then shut her eyes again and hid her face in the guitarist's neck. Richard felt so relieved, finally after 15 years he let this nasty secret out in the open for Emma. He was content hearing her breathing finally calm and peaceful.