Catching Feelings

Chapter 1 - Beginning

It was an eerie cold night, and I was freezing. Like every other day, I was tired, hungry and finding a place to sleep. I had no idea where I was gonna go, but still, I kept walking. My physical strength had exhausted- my head was heavy and my feet were sore, but my faith was still alive. I encouraged myself that I could make it through today, like all the other days and wake up tomorrow with a renewed spirit.

I plodded downhill, staring at the beautiful reflection of the full moon in the water. As I walked at the bay, faint sounds of sobbing pervaded in my ears. If it was true or not I couldn’t tell, but I was sure there was someone crying.

I followed the sound, and saw a person, sitting alone on a bench by the shore, weeping. It was a boy, and his hair was covered in a beanie. He looked rich, I could tell by his clothes. But it fascinated me to wonder what could make rich people cry.

I always thought people who had a lot of money had everything -because to me, this world runs on money. If you don’t have money, then you don’t have anything- No social status, no respect, no braded Gucci bags, no Armani dresses and no seaside bungalow.

I moved a bit and caused a stir in the bushes- now he could tell there was someone watching him over. “Who’s that?” His deep, husky voice called out. I gasped. What if he was not nice enough a stranger to talk to at this time of the night? I hesitated to make a move.

He probably saw me- But turned away in indignantly. Maybe he too hates me like all the other people. I had embraced the fact that I was a disgrace to the society. “Look I’m really not in the mood for a picture or an autograph… I really want some time alone.” He sounded a bit irritated. Why would I want an autograph?

I kept quiet. I didn’t know what to do. But he turned over again, wiped a tear and said, “Well I don’t bite that’s for one thing…” and turned away rather quickly. A faint smile appeared on my face, and I took small steps to reach him, partly wary of him and party, deciding what to say.

“Hello” I said softly. He didn’t reply, but just looked at the water. I looked into his aquamarine eyes, shining with the light from the moon. “You know who I am?” He asked me. “No” I nodded sideways and wondered why he’d ask me this. “Neither do I” He ejaculated.

“Sit down if you want…” He said and I took a seat beside him, careful of maintaining appropriate distance. “Who are you?” I asked, and noticed his brows furrowed in confusion at my question. “Well, I’m still trying to figure that one out.” He said with a light sob. I could tell he was man enough not to cry in front of a girl.

Confusion dawned on me. “Why?” I asked. The answer was a deep sigh. He raised his hands to wipe his wet eyes, and cupped his face in his hands. “I am a confused being who is stuck in a mess called life and trying to sort things that I know wouldn’t get sorted.” He enunciated.

His answer just got me intrigued. Why would somebody introduce themselves like that?

A cool breeze made my hair move gently, and I shrank inside my thin shirt. “You want my jacket?” He asked, but I didn’t know how to reply. So he took it off himself and wrapped it around me. “Won’t you feel cold?” I asked.

“I don’t feel anything anymore. Every part of me has gone numb.” He replied. I notice light dimples appear on his face when he moved his lips.

But each word that he said got me inquisitive. I wanted to know more about him- why can’t he feel anything? Why doesn’t he fear anything? What happened with him? I wanted to know, but I didn’t know how to initiate a conversation. So I started with something random. “You know it can be really dangerous for you hanging around at this time of the night?”

“What are you, my mom?” He said out of nowhere, and quite frankly, I was offended. But I guess he felt bad, and immediately corrected himself, “I have nothing to lose, so there’s nothing to be afraid of.” I frowned at him.

“But that’s quite awkward for a girl to say. ‘Being here at this time of the night’…” he copied me. “You are here too, what about you?” He asked, leaving me in riddles on what to answer. “Nothing, I just sneaked out.” I said. “For?” he further asked. “…A stroll?” I said awkwardly.

“Something tells me you’re lying…” He glares at me. “C’mon, I only lie to my parents.” I said in a funny way. I thought he would smile, but he didn’t. His lips almost curved into one, but then he stopped himself.

“I don’t even know if I should talk to you…” He said as he buried his face in his hands.

“You can really share your problems with me, you know. I’m good at keeping secrets.” I mulled over, considering that there was something that was troubling him. “You are?” He asked. He turns his red face and puffy eyes towards me, and I realized he was quite attractive.

I give a slight nod, dumbfounded. I wonder what he’s thinking. Our eyes lock together in a trance. But he breaks it and clears his throat to avoid the awkward situation.

I better get going, I think. But I don’t want to. I wanna know who he is and what’s happened with him. “What’s your name?” He asks, turning towards me and voicing my mind.

“Emma…” I say, not looking at him. “Emma, what…?” He asks, and my heart sinks. I hate that question. “What do you have to do with it?” I say rather indignantly, but he just shrugs. And now I feel guilty.

“What’s your problem? I mean, what problems can a person like you have?” I said. “What do you mean by a person like me?” He said, awkwardly. “I mean, you look good- and- rich.”

 “Looking good and being rich isn’t everything.” He replied. “Now I can relate with that fact…” What was wrong with him? Crying alone sitting on a wooden bench in the middle of the night and talking in circles- Why is he acting like a girl?

“What is wrong with you? I told you my problems. You tell me yours?” I asked. But he hesitated. “I lost someone I loved.” He said.  

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