Buttercream Imagines

12: New Zealand

Dreams and dedication are a powerful combination
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(Conor)
Conors pov

I was sitting on the couch watching a film with Freya when my phone pinged indicating i had a message from my manager

Manager- Hey Conor, i got an amazing career opportunity for yesterday, i forwarded the email onto you. I told them you would take it. All the details are on the email, check it asap.

Surely they cant accept an offer without me even knowing about it? I glance at Freya and see shes asleep so i go into my office and open up my emails. I just scanned through, most of it was just what i would be doing and all the little details which i don't need to take not of, then one bit catches my eye-

Your plane leaves for New Zealand at 11am, Friday 16th June 2017. This trip will be for 4 months and only permits you and your manager to attend.

What the fuck. I look at my calendar, Tuesday 13th June. Great. In three days ill be flying over to New Zealand by myself for four months. No Freya. Not even Jack can come. What am i supposed to tell them? Oh yeah, in three days im jetting off to New Zealand for work which i didn't give my permission to accept. But don't worry i'll only be gone for four months and i have to go alone.? Im sure they'd love that.

I didn't tell anyone about my work trip that day, the next day or the day after that. Its currently 8:29 on Friday aka the day i leave. I managed to get packed enough clothes for one month, i figured id just wash everything, while she was out doing a food shop.
Freya's laying on our bed looking through some of her photos from a shoot she did a couple of months back. I love the way her face lights up at the few photos that got took when i was talking to her, the photographer couldn't use them as they were for a magazine but gave us them so we could use them.
"Jack left some clothes and stuff here from when he last stayed and i need to go to the studio to drop off some music and equipment." I say as i walk over to the bed and kiss Freya on her temple.
"Okay, just don't stay at Jacks or the studio too long." She says, god i feel so guilty.
"Mhm. Bye love you babe."
"Love you too, bye" i pull her into a kiss and take the two suitcases and go.

Freyas pov

Theres something i've been needing to tell Conor for a couple of weeks now, i've decided when he comes back from dropping the stuff off i'll tell him.

Conors pov

When the plane landed in New Zealand i had loads of texts from Freya asking where i was, i knew i had to tell. I couldn't go four months pretending to be at my parents or staying at the boys' or not talking to her

Me- My manager accepted an offer of going to New Zealand for a career opportunity and my plane left this morning. I wasn't aloud to take anyone with me and i couldn't bring myself to tell you. Im sorry x
Freya ❤- I get it, it's for work and it'll be a great opportunity for you. But you could have at least said something about it.
Me- I know and i hate myself for bot saying anything about it. I really do
Freya ❤- How long will you be gone
Me- Four months
Freya ❤- Okay...
Freya ❤- Look i cant talk to you over text knowing i won't see you for months.
Freya ❤- When you come back, don't expect the house to look it did or me to be the same. But don't worry, there won't be anymore guys because you will always be my one and only
Me- Its okay, i get it. I'd be mad at what i done to. I was selfish
Me- Goodbye for now, love x
Freya❤️- Goodbye for now Conor x

And that was it. The last and only conversation i had with her in the four months i was away. I was sat on the plane going back to England thinking about the past four months without her. The time in New Zealand, it was okay. I have an album ready to be released and i worked with some amazing artists but it wasn't the same. The other side of the bed was cold and empty. I didn't have anyone to tell me stupid jokes or complain about their day over dinner. No one was there to talk when i couldn't sleep because of my insomnia. There wasn't anyone singing in the shower while i laid in bed and listened. I didn't have anyone to say i love you to. Half my heart was left in England.
The usual airport checks went pretty quickly. Im sat in the back of an uber watching the busy streets of London. I can't wait to go back home but not the way everyone else sees it. Home, back in her arms. The drive back seems to take longer than usual but it's probably just all of the quilt slowing down time.
I stand outside our front door for a good 5 minutes. Too scared to enter too scared to leave.
Eventually i manage to pick up the courage and unlock the door. I leave my suitcases, bag shoes and coat by the door and walk through to the living room. Everything seems...different. I stand in the doorway, Freya's back to me.
"Freya?" I ask quietly. She turns around and what i see is something i didn't expect.
"Hi." She whispers cradling a very small baby in her arms
"Hi" i take a step into the room "Whos-Whos that?" i ask pointing to the baby.
"This is your daughter, Conor." Freya says with a scared tone in her voice.
"My daughter?" I ask taken back a bit. I never knew she was pregnant "I have a daughter!"
"Yeah, yeah you do." she says smiling down at the human in her arms.
"Hannah"
"Huh?"
"Hannah, shes called Hannah" She says giggling a bit "Do you want to hold her? Or are you just going to be a bystander"
"What? No no no i cant hold her. I mean what if i drop her or if she jumps out my arms or-"
"Conor, calm down. Shes two weeks old so i highly doubt she'll jump out of your arms. I don't think you'll drop her, Mikey didn't and thats saying something."
"Okay" I say and Freya hands me little Hannah Sophia Maynard. We talk for a little longer about my time in New Zealand.
"So, Hannah is our child right?" I ask cautiously
"Yeah, she was 2 months early which is why shes so small. The day you left was the day i was going to tell you i was pregnant, but you never came back."
"And i can't tell you how sorry i am for that i regret every day walking through that door and not telling you why."
"We all make mistakes so don't stress too much over it okay?"
"Okay." I reply "So, how far along were you when i-you know?"
"3 months but you couldn't tell because of how skinny i am so i kind of just fit my clothes like everyone else does but once i hit 5 months you could really tell."
"I wish i could have stayed here and seen it with you." i sigh
"Well, i kept all my ultrasounds and Jack gave me his old vlogging camera so i filmed all of the scans and Hannahs first week. I didn't want you having a child but not seeing anything before she was born."
"Well at least it's something i guess?"
"Yeah" she sighs "But at least you've still got both hands wish the same could be said for your brother..." i shoot her a confused look before changing Hannahs position "I um kinda broke both Jack's hands in labour, turns out i have a very low pain tolerance." she said with a guilty look spreading across her face

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Sorry for the pretty shit ending but i wrote this while walking around Texas at 6am yesterday so...