Build-A-Boyfriend

1

I have been single since roughly 1000 BC and it shows no sign of changing right now.

There are several very good reasons for this;

1. I laugh like a donkey on LSD.

2. I have a nose the size of a small European country.

3. My name is Hendrix. Yes. Hendrix. I'm sure we can all agree that it's an affliction, not a name.

4. I don't like sharing food. Seriously, try and put your fat hand in my nachos and I will bite you.

5. I am not the most attractive human that ever lived. Occasionally I'll spend several hours preening and come out of it as a 6 maybe 7 but seriously who has time for that on a day to day basis? I'm averaging a 2 on a morning, an extremely generous 5 after I've slapped some foundation on and only if you're a bit blind and viewing me in dim lighting.

6. I'm crap at conversation. Want to talk for hours about how hilarious cat memes are? I'm your girl. Small talk and dazzling wit? I got nothing for ya fam.

7. I tend to be extremely awkward around human males. Cats and dogs I'm cool with. Human males... Nah.

8. I dress like a Yugoslavian potato farmer.

9. Literally, my only hobby in life is getting my cat to chase a red laser around the room.

10.  All of my free time is spent reading people argue in comments section of facebook posts.

This may come as a shocker, but there isn't a long line of guys queuing up to date me.

This is the story of how I attempted to create the ideal man.

And how it all went a bit wrong.

***

Hello and welcome to another new story! Yayyyyy

First things first, this story belongs to @GotTheStyles which is moi. Please don't steal or replicate parts of it. Even taking scenes, characters or one liners from a story is copying. PLEASE, don't do it. It's so upsetting and frustrating and to be honest, I'd rather people who do that just didn't read. It's so annoying and ruins wattpad,

Second, don't worry, Hendrix is not going to be exactly like Lennon from WLMH. I promise 😜

Who wouldn't want a mail order Harry? What could go wrong..? 😉