Ups and downs

Keith

Two days before my nineteenth birthday I was taken to the E.R. I was so sick I couldn't even hold down water. By this time we had gotten excited about the baby, picked out names and started preparing. He convinced me no matter what we could do this. I had my dad over for dinner on my birthday. My boyfriend helped clean the house and get ready. He was sweet and considerate , he didn't want me overdoing it. My birthday was great, four days later was our next doctors appointment and we were looking forward to it. We drove two hours to the city because by this point I was classified as a high risk pregnancy and needed a specialist. We were very excited to see our little one until the nurse got a very weird look on her face. I remember her saying " oh no, this isn't good, I'll be right back." I immediately started crying, I knew something was wrong. He held me while I cried until the doctor came in. She apologized for the nurse upsetting me and said she wanted to take a look. Then we got the news, our beautiful little baby had passed away before he got a chance. We found out when I had went to the e.r. and they put me on medicine, they made a mistake. It was not safe for pregnant women. A day later I was put in the hospital where I then delivered my little angel. When I woke up they told me it was a little boy. They waited a couple hours and sent me home. As of it was a routine procedure when I felt like my entire world was crumbling everything around me kept moving. I shut out everyone , I blamed myself and I blamed God. I was lost. That little boy had become my everything. Little by little me and my boyfriend were drifting away from each other. We grieved separately and in our own ways. Little did I know it would make us stronger.