( just for intro to a visual )~The main characters name is Shazaya shes fourteen but looks and acts much older, shes an average girl, brown hair hazel like eyes five foot five tall so pretty petite, shes very strange from the others because no one can pin down what kind of person that she really is. I have always felt... different from everyone else only to find that... I really am completely different, this is just a corps to seal who is real, inside of me. I always feel these three completely different sides of myself
I love this place. It's really beautiful, but whenever I come here I come to cry, or be alone, sometimes just to think about things. As always I sit here alone lost in my thoughts .I didn't know what to do, or where to go anymore, it feels like I keep losing my hope.
"I'm alone, I will Always be alone because this world has no room for me. "
I truly hate myself, I messed up somewhere among the lines of life but I have no idea where it was that I fucked up so hard.
"HEY FREAK SHOW!"
"Huh?...What is it?"
"Why don't you answer me with some more respect? Get this, you talk to me with a yes sir kinda reaction understand that? HUH! Well answer me?!"
I'm not going to keep being this nice to him forever, Jeez does he ever feel bad? I mean, sure he lost his mother but, why blame me? Is it because I look like her? Either way this needs to end before I lose my head on him. Back before his mother's murder we were really close friends, but then when she died he became an asshole to everyone he ever cared for, he hates everything he used to love because of it. I watched him fall all at once, the moment he walked out of his own home with her blood all over him and knowing that the man got away destroyed everything in his mind. The poor kid thinks it's his fault. That's why I'll wait and wait until he comes back. If he comes back..
"Yes ...Sir... "
I want to laugh so badly but I can't, it would be against what I've been doing to help save him from his sadness.
"Good now sit like a dog. After all, you're just a useless mutt."
"No."
"What was that? You do as I SAY understand?!"
* spkt!*
He hit me! He hit my right in the mouth! WHY THE FUCK DID HE HIT ME?! Well fuck him, I'll hit him right back in the gut!
"NO! Keep your hands OFF me! "
*fwip*
" ARGHHH WHAT THE HELL?!! *COUGH * COUGH* "
He threw up.... he looks really hurt...Why did he make me do this?! I didn't want to hurt him! Did he want me to hit him, Was that what he has been trying to do?! I just... Just...All I Wanted was to help...Is that wrong? Is it wrong to want to help people?! I don't get this kind of world...Where we all have to fight for the fact of your existence to be known, to live in peace, to help those who need it?! Whatever it doesn't even matter right now I just have to get away from here. Away from shawn. He is always doing these things to me for no real good reason though. This is how my everyday life is, it tends I'm glad I got away because if that punch didn't get him off guard I could have really hurt him and I don't want that, But something is really worrying me, He had this look on his face, This look was weird because I can read people like an open book... But this look of his, was so...Strange and confusing. Because I couldn't tell if he was mad or...About to cry because of how I hit him in the gut. You know I just realized that I haven't told you my name. Anyway back to this present time. What's really sad is that a day after Shawn's Mother's death I came to school walked into class and at first he thought that...I was his mother...The poor kid lost his mom and I wasn't helping looking like her and being around him, I felt so guilty and I just started to leave him alone so I couldn't make it any worse.
"Oh no! Oh man I got lost in thought, then got lost out here in the open...In the city no less! Man and I don't even have a phone on me! Jeez I'm so done for!