The Renegade

Chapter 10: Minor Side Effects

All eyes were on me. They were apologetic, saying, "You can't say no to him."
"Just sit in the chair," he pauses. "Schiffs,"
As soon as her name is called, her head snaps to look at Captain Ezra. "Uh . . . yes?"
"I am putting you in charge of the simulation. I'll walk you through it."
Schiffs has a look of both horror and disgust. She grips the knife on her calf tightly. After a few long seconds, her grip loosens. She can't do anything, and she realizes that.
"Alright. Chop-chop you two," he says giddily.
My eyes meet with Schiffs' and we both freeze. "Well?" Ezra says, obviously starting to get annoyed.
Schiffs trudged over to the computer next to the chair. I hesitate before following her. She gives me one last sympathetic look before I sit in the chair and she straps on the helmet, blocking my view to the rest of the squadron.
"Alright. I'll guide you through this," Ezra says. "Now, you want to click on her name once it pops up on the display. Ahhh . . . yes. Then you want to hit the right- yep. And hit the RSP button."
Suddenly, the chair beneath me isn't a chair anymore. The chair now was connected to me. I could feel the metal on top of my skin, barely giving it enough room to breathe. The platform that the chair once rested on was now more like a cage, inhabiting some kind of fence and track beneath my feet. It was expanding, and I heard a few gasps from the squad.
Captain Ezra chuckles before continuing, "Good. Now, you want to click on the type of simulation. I say, for discipline reasons, we show her her biggest fear and worst memory. "
"Is this a suggestion or a command," Schiffs asks quickly.
"Call it whatever you want, you're doing it either way."
I hear Schiffs grunt, "Then you do it! I'm not doing that to Belle."
I could practically see the look on his face. The look of pure disgust. I could, but the only thing I really saw was darkness with a faint blue glow.
"Fine," I hear him say. The machine beneath me and on me starts up. I hear a yelp escape my lips as a needle pricks my hand and the blood drips onto the floor. The room isn't dark anymore. Now, I'm standing outside of a nursery. Except this nursery has plastic containers with all but one child. The child was sleeping peacefully. There was a T.V. sitting next to her, spewing both foreign languages and fighting techniques. A nurse approaches the infant and pulls up a monitor besides the baby. It pulled up the baby's heart rate and name, I'm assuming. I'm only guessing because instead of a name, there were numbers and letters. 'B6L2L-6N0A3.'
An almost angelic voice rings in my head, echoing off of the walls of my skull. "This is a memory, isn't it?"
I clutch my pounding head. It hurt more than a headache. I felt like my brain was going to pop out of my skull. It pounded even harder than it did that day.
"The question is . . . whose memory is it?" I glance around the room, head still softly pounding. The baby cries out. A sharp needle pokes at the baby's arm until it stopped crying, which took a while. The baby's arm was now bleed profusely. Of course, the infant was helpless and useless to itself. All it did was squirm. After the baby passes out from blood loss, the nurse finally steps in. She wrapped the baby's arm with a cloth and injects another needle -with medicine- into their arm. I knew what that was -A blood-clotting serum. The nurse looks toward me and nods. Startled, I step back and phase through a man wearing a lab coat.
"She's the first one. She's going to be special. And she's going to end this war. I can feel it."
Another man approaches, "Indeed. Finally, we'll be all-powerful. There's nothing those little towns can do to stop us."
The voice comes back, giving me another massive headache. "I'm assuming this is in the early stages of The Renegade." He pauses thoughtfully, "Being that he said the small towns instead of The Renegade. You know, as crazy as it seems, Pittsburgh wasn't always a small everyone-knows-everyone type of town. Then again, that almost goes for every town. It used to have hundreds of thousands of people. In fact, North America used to have hundreds of millions of people."
"What," my voice barely manages to create. I heard legends that there used to be many more people than there are now. There were a couple stages of the war. The Nuclear Stage, The Infection Stage, The Atmospheric Stage, The Hell Stage- the war lasted a hundred years, minimum, and is still going now killing thousands, if not millions. But to even think that that many people have lived on our continent alone is, none the less, horrifying.
"Yeah. Just to think that this tiny... thing... could potentially end the ongoing war," The voice says.
Suddenly I realize the owner of the voice. "So how does this machine allow you to talk to me doing the simulation?"
"Oh it depends," Ezra says. "I don't want to give you an answer you wouldn't like."
"I won't like it either way. Spill."
"Well, I'm not the one stuck in a simulation," he grunts. "Besides, I don't want to go into the logistics. Here's all you need to know: I'm not telling you jack shit."
"Well aren't you the gentlemen," I mumble under my breath.
"What was that?"
"Not a thing," I retort.
Then, all of a sudden, I'm next to the squadron in the training room. Thank god, that pointless simulation is over.
"Man, you guys got me out of that really quick! I don't even-"
"Belle we got some news for you," Hannah says sternly.
"W-what?"
There's a few chuckles and a couple snickers, making my heart start to pick up speed.
"You're out," Schiffs whaled.
"Out? Out of the simulation? Heh yeah... I know I'm out." I look down to my feet, "I'm here. Aren't I?"
"No, you dummy," Schmitty giggles.
Maansi crosses her arms, "You're out of the Renegades."
"Um, what?"
"We're done with you," Hallie explains.
"We know what you did," Mia purred.
"We've got our information from you," Riley continues.
"We have no more reason to keep you here," Jenna hissed.
"I can't believe you ever thought we were your friends," Jeff taunts.
"You're nothing," Mike mocks.
"It would've been better if you weren't ever made," Shawna mutters.
"You should've died on that street that day after Jeff shot you," Nikki noted.
"You're useless," Robby breathed.
"You're going back to the Govern," Christian murmured.
"Where they'll tear you apart," Kylee continues.
"N-no. You... you guys..." my heart starts racing, and I feel gravity push on my buckling knees. My head droops, "You guys can't take me back there." When I look back up, I'm surrounded by darkness. I heard whispers and giggles from somewhere that I couldn't see. Invisible fingers grasp around my neck, unsteadying my breath. The air is knocked out of my lungs. Leaning back, I realize that I can blame a wall for that. My nerves start unreeling, and my heart is beating uncontrollably.
"GET HER OUT OF THERE," I hear someone yell. "QUICKLY."

It felt like a Band-Aid being pulled off of my skin. Except this Band-Aid was metal. And all over my body. It was painful, but only for a mere second. I look around to surprisingly not see anyone. I finally realize that I wasn't look at them, but instead the ground. A feel someone tug on my left arm, and I push off of the ground with my right. Once I'm on my feet, I glance to my left to see Schiffs completely supporting my numb legs. Her eyes said, "What did you see?"
I shook my head. My throat was so taught that I was seconds away from crying, so I said nothing. We stumble over to a chair and almost everyone surrounds me.
"Who's next?" Captain Ezra asks gleefully.
~~~~
Kylee had volunteered in the place of Schiffs, who Captain Ezra shockingly picked next. She was hooked up in no time. I stand in the very back, slightly distanced from the squad. However I still had a horrifyingly good enough view of the results of the simulation. Nikki glanced back and did a double take, realizing how far away I was from the group. She makes her way back and stands next to me. She says nothing. She probably figured that her presence would make me feel better. Maybe I could consult in her if I just so needed to.
After a long period of silence between us, I glance at her, "What do you think you'll see? When you go into the simulation, that is."
"Nothing."
"Come on, you can't not be afraid of anything?"
"No, that's not what I meant. I meant nothingness," she says in a hushed tone.
I nod, "The darkness."
"It's not the darkness I'm afraid of. I'm afraid of the secrets and things that lie within it."
"You think you'll ever be able to let it go?" I wince - that came out harsher than I wanted it to.
She shrugs, "there's always going to be darkness. And there's always going to be something behind it. And we never know what that is. That's why it's horrifying. We're scared of what we don't know."
I turn my head to look at her and catch her staring off thoughtfully. She continues, "So, no. I don't think I'll ever be able to let that go."
I nod again, taking in what she said. She's right. I don't know what Captain Ezra was thinking. If he was thinking that this would help us to get over our fears, somehow help on the field, then he's dead wrong. I glance back at Kylee, and she's physically shaking. Christian naturally starts freaking out, and Schiffs goes to work on the computer. She was radiating determination, as if she won't make a mistake. Schiffs barks at Christian to go near Kylee's right side, and brace just in case Kylee is going to fall out of the exoskeleton. Naturally, Kylee falls. But this time, Christian was on her right and Schiffs on her left, supporting her. They hold her there until she says that she can stand on her own. When they first let go, she stumbles forwards. She catches herself, making the two flinch. She dismisses them, and they both back away. Kylee stands up straight and decided to do a lap around the bottom floor of the training room.
"This is fun," Ezra says mockingly. "Next!"
Ezra choses Nikki, but Riley volunteers in her place. Riley gets hooked up and her simulation starts. I find this slightly funny how quickly time seems to pass in the real world, but when you're in there, it feels like forever. This time, we all sit there quietly, awaiting -no, expecting- something bad to happen. So when tears start dripping down Riley's features, Schiffs was quick to get her out. Nikki, desperate to repay her, rushes to her right side to catch her.
Ezra laughs, "Now someone cried? This is getting better and better."
What.
I look over to Riley and her head is hanging, and it wasn't from the simulation. I looked around to the other smog members, and they were all emitting anger. Fuming.
"We're done for today," Kylee says through gritted teeth. Kylee was still shaking, but not as intensely as she was when she left the simulation.
"But why? The fun is just getting-"
"I said. We. Are. Done."
I don't think I've heard her so angry.
"Kylee I don't-"
"Ezra," Kylee says sternly.
"Fine," he says harshly, "Transmission over and out."
The screen clicks off and turns black before reverting back to the regular training walls.
Thump.
"Riley!?"
I look over and Riley had fallen face-first on the ground. Mike, Jeff, Nikki, and Schiffs approach her unconscious body. Schiffs checks her for a pulse and hold her hand in front of her mouth.
"She's still alive," she deduces. "Heart rate normal, breathing regular."
Then, it happens again.
Thump.
Kylee drops to the floor like a fly.
"Kylee!?"
Now this time everyone gathers around her. Schiffs checks her pulse and breathing too, and says the same thing. I step back, starting to get light headed.
"Wait," Schiffs says abruptly. "If Kylee and Riley passed out, and if they both were in the simulation..."
Everyone turns towards me.
"Guys," I manage to force out. "I-I'm not-"
"Belle!?"
I taste the cold, hard floor of the training room once again. My eye lids felt heavy, and I felt...
I fel...t
My consiou-
Consciousness...
Slip...
Slipping.