Unshed

Part One

A/N don't be too critical. This is one of my first stories on Wattpad, BUT it's not my first story. What? You think I was completely inexperienced.
Okay, so my only warnings throughout this entire book is...
1.) Strong language
2.) Girl×Girl (if you're too uncomfortable with it, this just isn't your kind of story)
3.) The glory of smut
4.) Rape, nothing too descriptive, but it's there.
5.) Mentions of self-harm\suicide

OkayOkay. Anyway, I'm IN LOVE with feedback, so don't be a silent reader!

"I'm just tired," I lied to the short brunette walking beside me on the street after she asked if something was on my mind. Everyone has been asking if I was okay lately, and that's all I had to say. Honestly, I have no clue what's wrong with me. If anything, I just grew better than before.

Nevertheless, I caught the sarcastic glint in the girl's deep, brown eyes. Rolling my own, I decided to stare down at the concrete I was walking on to distract myself from her.

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"I think I want to get a haircut," I explained in Mom's direction, running my fingers through my long, red hair that traveled down to the middle of my stomach. It was just plain annoying, really. Every morning was a routine of quickly brushing through the rat's nest I held right on my head.

Mom didn't take her eyes from the sizzling eggs as she questioned nonchalantly, "How short?" The tips of my fingers went to point to the spot where I wanted it cut, but soon enough when Mom "ahemed" I realized that she couldn't really see me.

She usually couldn't.

Dropping my hand to my side awkwardly, I answered, "Jawline." And that woman looked to me for the first time this morning with a look that could make the president hide his face in shame. I took a deep breath.

Mom ran her pudgy fingers through her long, blonde hair. "Do you really want it that short?" Her voice came sharp and sarcastic as she laughed at me.

She laughed at me.

I could only grip my right arm with my left hand and look to the floor, drooping my brows. She always made me feel like this. Like I was a piece of crap that didn't know what was right.

Standing up straight again, I nodded and retreated for the front door. My lips muttered a "see you after school" before the door shut, and just in time, the small, slick, black car pulled up in front of me. A smile came onto my face as I walked around in front of it and dropped myself in the passenger seat.

"Fancy seeing you here," My best friend spoke to me from the driver's seat, her dirty blonde hair wet from the rain and dark from the clouds that moved over the sun. She smiled at me as I propped my arm up on the door. I chuckled and buckled in. My overly Christian Mom always scolded me for forgetting to "be safe" -- as she worded it. Though, she hasn't driven me anywhere after I turned fifteen.

"And how was your morning," I asked, turning my head to her. Eponine is what she called herself. Or what her parents decided to call her sixteen years ago. They always said that the name reminded them of the sky and a very blue sky, might I add, and that's why she was named that. Her eyes were as bright a blue as the sky that surrounded the sun, and I couldn't help but stare into them. Far into them.

She smiled an award winning smile as she let her next words slide off her tongue, "Just perfect." A light, rosy color was painted across her pale cheeks, her eyes seeming to have traveled far, far from this conversation.

She looked so happy like that that I couldn't help but smile wide. "Tell me what happened," I urged her and reached my fingers over to squeeze her arm gently, excitedly, sending electricity coursing through my arm and into my shoulder.

Eponine just smiled wider. "I met him. The guy that brought me flowers when I was alone out by the sun setting. He is the cutes-"

I cut her off, "What's his name?"

She giggled, a sound like the sea crashing over the sand. "Adam. Isn't it a pretty name. He even kissed my cheek and my hair... and my hand-" 

"He kissed you?"

A low sigh came from her end. I couldn't hear much else though. Nothing more than her words, her sounds. None of the cars passing or the clock that should be ticking in my head. None of this is real, I could tell myself, none of it, but it is real. Eponine finally met a boy.

Over a few minutes, she changed the topic after she grew uncomfortable in her seat, "When are you going to meet a boy?" I couldn't help but wonder what that meant.

"I already have... Sam, Jonah, Everette-"

She drew a short breath. "I meant, when are you going to meet a boy that you like... like, like-like kind of like."

"Actually..." I started, my features twisting at what she was surely implying, "I'm in love with this fella." Pulling out my phone, I showed her the picture of the beautiful, black Ram 4 x 4 2500 that I was sure to purchase once my job finally paid enough.

She snorted and finally started up her car. "Oh, come on. Love an actual guy for once." This comment left me to fold my hands and stare off at them. Who did she think she was, pressuring me into having a crush. Maybe, just maybe I can have one. I mean, Everette is a guy someone could call cute, with his long, jet black hair running past his shoulders and tanned skin over his face and arms. Not to mention that six pack that I truly wanted from him. I could kill him for it.

"Everette is pretty hot, I guess," I explained to her as she drove off.

A smile as wide as a river spread across her face as she glanced at me. "You are SO hotter than his girlfriend. Lidia, you could totally land a date with him."

I smiled, a warm sensation rising to my cheeks as it usually did when she said stuff to me like that, and I'm not joking when I say that Everette's girlfriend is hot. Super hot. Nobody could really match up to her, let alone me.