The Rich And Popular

Why Do We Have Feelings?

After we got home I went straight to my room and locked the door. The twins weren't here yet because they get out at 5 when we get out at 3.

I started to work on my home work while listing to Our Own House by MisterWives. I had a lot of home work to do because I started on a Wednesday and the school wants me to catch up on the work that was assigned on Monday and Tuesday.

I was working for a while and almost have everything done, when there is a knock at my door. "Hey its Rylie and Rachel, we just wanted to tell you that were home." Rylie said through the door.

"Okay, thank you." I replied. "Okay bye." They both said.

I worked on my homeworkand I got it finished at around 7 at night. I was feeling kind of hungry so I decided to get a snack.

As I was going to the kitchen I had to pass the living room and of course, Noah had some of his friends over.

I of course saw Jamie and James still here. There were a couple of other people that I don't know, and then there was Britney.

"Was is that fat, ugly, bitch still doing here." Britney said. "Well I live here so..." I said. "Well I just thought that you would go back to your fat, ugly mother." Britney replied all snotty.

Now I was mad no one talks about my mom like that. "You don't know nothing you snotty ass bitch!" I practically yelled at her.

I then went I to the kitchen. There was an island in the middle of the room. So I put my hands on it and looked down at the floor, trying to get myself to calm down.

As I was slowly starting to calm done I was looking around the island, and right next to me was a steak knife. I just kept starring at the knife.

I will admit that I used to cut myself. I haven't done it in a year. And when I did it last year it was a relapse from stopping a couple of months before then.

I never thought about cutting myself because my mom said that there was a lot of things you would be missing out on if you stopped your life so young.

I didn't even realize that I was going to grab the knife, until I heard someone clear there throat. I immediately brought my hands to my side and looked up. I saw James looking between me and the knife. It seemed liked he did this forever.

"You missed dinner." He said finally leaving his eyes on me. "I'm not that hungry." I said looking at the ground. "Are you sure?" James asked. "Yes I'm sure, I have to finish homework now." I lied.

As I was leaving the kitchen in a hurry looking at the ground, I suddenly got a really sharp pain in my left cheek. I fell in the doorway of the kitchen and the living room. I looked up and I saw Britney looking down at me and laughing. I looked around and saw everyone else but Jamie, James and Noah laughing too.

"Ha that's what you get you fat ugly bitch." Britney said. I couldn't see anything properly because there was tears in my eyes. I at least saw a hand come down trying to help me up, but I only swatted it away. I got up on my own still holding my cheek and ran to my room.

Once I got there I slammed and locked my door. I started going through my things looking for something. And then I found it, my exact o knife. I took the blade out and went to my bathroom.

I was staring at myself in the mirror. Thinking I will never be pretty enough, skinny enough, the perfect friend, the perfect sister, the perfect daughter. Ever thought I had I cut a mark in one of my wrists. I was crying the whole time, but I felt so right.

I soon just fell on the floor to exhausted to continue. When my head hit the floor I just passed out.

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