I have a boyfriend who grew up with me. His name is Ren Huggins. I always thought of him as an ignorant, boastful, self-centered person until, last year when we went to a trip to Hontou Amusement park. I found that I fell for him.
Before that trip was over, my friends who knew of my feelings for him, encouraged me to confess to him. He only stared at me with his steely eyes. After many sermons from his pals, he reluctantly dated me. And soon, he forced himself to be my boyfriend. He only did that out of pity. I knew.
I always concentrated on him only, but it seemed like I'm the only one who cared. He was the only one for me but I couldn't feel that he feels the same way. I never heard him say that he loved me. I never saw it in his eyes nor felt it when we're together. I never did. I don't know what's going on inside his head, he never told me anything. We don't have any anniversaries either. Maybe to him, I'm just another girl.
"Ren, do you want to watch a movie?" I asked, hope evident in my voice.
"I can't, Pirika." was his bland reply.
"Why? You need to study at home?" I felt disappointed.
"No, I'm going to meet a girl."
He was always like that. He met girls in front of me, like it was nothing. He didn't say anything since the first day we became lovers and it continued for a hundred days… two hundred days. Everyday, before we say goodbye, he would just hand me a cute teddy bear, without fail. I don't know why.
Then one day…
"Umm… Ren, I…"
"What? Don't drag, just say it."
"I… love you."
He only stared at me for a moment before shrugging. He reached into his backpack and gave me another teddy bear. "You… just take this and go home."
That was how he ignored my three words. Then, he disappeared, like he was running away. The bears I received from him everyday, filled my room, one by one. There were many. Some of different colors, if not, different styles of bows, each one was unique.
Then one day came, my 17th birthday. When I got up in the morning, I pictured a party with him, and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call. But… lunch passed, dinner passed… and soon, the sky was dark. He still didn't call. It was already tiring to look at the phone. Then around 2 A.M in the morning, he suddenly called and woke me from my sleep. He told me to come out of the house. Even though I was still sleepy, I felt glad and happily ran out of the house.
"Ren?"
"Here, take this." Again, he gave me another teddy bear.
"What's this?"
"I didn't give it to you yesterday, so I'm giving it to you now. Duh?-I'm going home now, bye."
"Wait!"
He stopped a few meters from me.
"Do you know what today is?"
"Today? Monday."
I felt so sad; I thought he would remember my birthday. I remembered his. June 21. Why can't he do the same thing for me? He turned around and walked away like nothing happened. The breeze, slightly danced through his dark hair.
"Wait…" I shouted.
"You have something to say?"
"Tell me, Ren, tell me…you love me…"
"What!"
"Tell me."
I put my pathetic self behind him and clung on to him.
