Lost + Found

1

  Have you ever felt alone in the world? Like there is no one that could pull you out of the darkness and pain of the world. That's me every day. Reaching and reaching for that hand to pull me up from the crashing waves of tears and anxiety. But slowly the pain gets to a point to were I'm just numb. I've slowly realized that the hand will never come to my ocean of abandonment and lose to pull me out and to see reality. Hope is the only thing that is saving me from the darkness at the bottom of the ocean of abandonment and lose. I hope for the one who will...

"Ms. Para!"

   I look up to see Ms. Steel staring at me. Her dark brown eyes strike mine like nails going into a board. I could tell everyone was staring at me. Like I was some monkey at a zoo doing tricks. They giggled and grinned as I begin to try and speak.

"Ye...Yes, Ms. Steel." I say as I was trying to realize what she was teaching.

"Can you tell me when Pompeii was destroyed?" She made a smirk on her face.

   I look down at my notes to see if I wrote down the answer. On the top of the paper it said: 79 A.D.. I look back up at her and say with a calm but some what nervous voice.

"79 A.D.?"

   She nods her head and turns back around to the market board. I take a deep breathe and close my eyes. I look back down at what I was writing. Save me, I say in my head. I grab my pencil to see the lead was broken.

  I sign, bending down to my bag, to find a new pencil. I started searching through the books and notebooks. As soon as I find my pencil bag I feel something hit my head. I look down to see a paper ball. I grab it and sit up. I look over to see Diana mouthing "open it". I roll my eyes and start to undo the paper ball.

It read:
Hey little Para. Why do you go to your fantasy worlds and get the fuck out of ours!
~Diana <3

   I scrabble up the paper into a ball like how it was. I look over at her giggling with her minions. I put the paper in my bag and zip it back up. I grab my pencil and finish what I was supposed to write.

Save me.

   I look over at my phone and see, 10:27. I close up my history notebook and pick it up. I unzip my bag to see the ball of paper. I squish it with the notebook so it will be in the bottom of the bag. I grab my pencil bag and throw it in my bag. I close my journal and put it in the secret pocket in my backpack. I zip up my bag then grab my headphones from the side pocket and sit them on the desk. I plug them into my phone and go to my music.

I put them in my ears and slowly breath in.

  As the bell rang, I grab my bag and headed out of class. I'm not a very popular kid. I'm the outcast of the class. The total loser. Dork. Bitch. Ugly. But the best one is slutty. I wear plaid flannels with skinny jeans. Usually my shirts are really big. Also I'm a virgin. How could I be a slut but a virgin. I just try to by pass it all and focus on writing and music. But I think the worst thing they call me is rich snob... I'm no were close to that. But that's another story. Another long and terrible story I hope I tell no one. But I guess all rich snobs leave in a nice two story house. So that could be why.

~

   I was sitting in 8th period wishing it would hurry up and be 3:15. I can hurry up and go to work. I do have to stop by the house before work. I have to get my uniform. I forgot it this morning. I just hope dad is out cold. Maybe he won't hear me come in.

  Finally, the bell rings. I hurry up and get to my car before Diana see me. I unlock my car and get in and lock the doors. I plug up my phone to the radio and switch on a song.

I turn it up loud so maybe I won't hear the popular kids gather around their cars and flirt with jocks. Look at them sometimes makes me want to throw up about how hard they try to get in a boys pants or let a boy get in their pants. They chew their gum and twirl their hair like they can get whatever they want. Which is true. They pretty much do. They rule the school. I take a deep breath and head out of the parking lot. I try to zone out my thoughts and just focus on the road and music. Maybe I'll be able to get through this day without crying.