figures of the void

one.

sometimes being drug free has less to do about addiction and more to do about sanity.
-shane koyczan, "to this day"

      cole woke up in a crappy mood. what else is new. he groaned and sat up briskly, which was a mistake. his head pounded and his ears rang, he was hungover. again. cole internally scolded himself as he carefully maneuvered out of the warmth of his bed and shuffled over the cold wooden floor to his bathroom. as he walked in, his eyes scanned over his appearance in the mirror. his usually clear blue eyes were bloodshot and glazed over, his pitch black hair tousled and knotted, and his snow white complexion had turned a sickly shade of green. he was a mess to say the least.

cole quickly parted his eyes from his reflection and transferred his attention to the shower. he turned the water on full heat, and stepped in, basking in the scorching water as if it would wash away his sins. he stood, letting the water pound down on his skin, then trickle down, causing chills to spiral down his spine. he then washed his body and turned off the water. while stepping out of the shower, he let the brisk air engulf him.

wrapping a towel around his waist, he headed to his dresser and pulled out a plain white cotton shirt and black jeans. he matched them with black combat boots and his leather jacket. yes, the epitome of a cliche bad boy.

he then walked over to his full length mirror and took in his appearance. his hair was still damp from his shower, so it was quite out of place, but other than that, cole looked normal. his blue eyes were back to normal, as was his skin. those traits also made him kind of a legend with the ladies here in Anaheim. his good looks served him well, and all of his previous encounters with undergrounds fighting rings had given him a very fit and toned physique. but his health was not nearly as impeccable. he was a known alcoholic, and can't remember a day he came home sober. not to mention that he was struggling every day with his bipolar depression.

if you asked cole about his condition, you would either get a snarky remark back, or a broken bone. only the unlucky ones got the latter. but what he really wants to say to those inquiries is, Bipolar depression is not something to be taken lightly. Bipolar depression is a disorder that is chronic or lifelong. it causes frequent mood swings, and makes the victim of the disorder to suffer highs called mania, and lows called depression. those mood swings are called episodes. and cole experiences them all the damn time. this disorder also makes him extremely anti-social. he hates having to meet new people, thinking they would classify him as a freak or an outcast. he heard enough of those names in his adolescence. when the bullying was as frequent as his episodes.

cole has changed drastically since then. he has gotten stronger. braver. smarter. but he also got even more troubled, making stupid decisions that cost him his reputation. that caused a new one to be born. he became a criminal. and cole was very aware of that. he embraced the fact that he has gotten arrested multiple times for multiple offenses. including 3 DUI's, 1 breaking and entering, and 5 vandalizing charges. all of the five vandalizing charges were for when cole came up with a design and he thought others would love seeing it on a plain, boring wall. he was just making art. but they like to call it graffiti. those nine fractures of the law caused permanent damage to cole's record. and to his mental state. he thought he was worthless. garbage. a waste of air. but then he would have another manic episode, and all of those sad thoughts would disappear into thin air. along with all of the shits he gave. now he's here. looking in the mirror at his reflection while his wet locks were dripping water onto his face, or maybe the wetness was tears. cole didn't care, his thoughts vanished when he heard his doorbell ring over and over again. and cole only knew of one person who rings doorbells multiple times. Mr.Gersh was here.

cole didn't bother getting the door because he know his foster mom, Lisa would let Gersh in. cole wasn't surprised when he heard Lisa's frail voice call to him from downstairs.

"cole, sweetie, Mr.Gersh is here and he has important news for you." the sweet woman yelled. cole loved Lisa. she had been there when nobody else was. she was a single woman with no kids. so he was all she had.

"coming", said an exhausted cole, who was walking slowly down the stairs, head still pounding, all though the shower did help a little.

he reached the living room, and saw a bald, scrawny older man by the name of Harold Gersh leaning against the doorway. little did cole know that the next words that came out of Harold's mouth would change cole's life for good.

"pack your bags, boy. you're getting some help."