These Days I Can't Sleep...

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These days I can't sleep so I take my daddy's gun

start shooting stars until I'm left wishing on vengeful galaxies.

These are my hands but they're really earthquakes.

This is my father's jacket but I know it as my cape.

My mother grows flowers from her flesh and it's

the saddest thing I know.

My mother grows flowers

and I wish she wasn't a garden.

My father puts his lips to a bottle because he can't

put them to his wife or a rifle. And he says, "Son,

find a love that lasts longer than the gun in your mouth."

So now I've got a prescription to make me forget

that my hands come with a tornado warning.

See, I'm just a child destroying constellations for fun.

I smash my mirrors because I was told

never to talk to strangers. I'm just a car crash kid

dreaming with the brakes cut.

I've got a lunatic in control of my lungs

and he's flipping the panic switch, the panic switch

and don't look at me,

don't fucking look at me

it's not my fault I can't breathe right.

Madness has washed me,

cleansed the saint from off my freckled skin;

now I'm a graveyard heart and I can't stop

digging six feet into the ground.

Listen, sanity was a girl I once put my lips to

and then burned in my backyard.

I took a shovel to her head and I learned that

when you've got a mouth like murder you've got

to be careful who you kiss. She left the taste of

chaos on my tongue and now I've got bomb

debris for teeth, left me that sharp shrapnel smile.

These days, I wear my dad's jacket

but I'm still not a superhero.

If you take my picture I won't recognize the boy in the photo

but I'll understand the way his hands are blurred.

This isn't you.

This is you.

I've got no notches on my bedpost

but I've got tally marks on my bones.

My father says I've got my mother's eyes

but he forgets to mention I've also got my mother's mind.

Now these days I can't sleep for

in the darkness there was a boy and

in the boy there was a darkness.

- Author Unknown

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