Flower of Thorns.

Thorns of Memories

// something i decided to write after having my best friend tell me why it is so hard to let go of someone you love so much even though it is my fault it ended. months later and i am still agonizing over it... either way, i hope you enjoy ^^' //

Have you ever just met someone and everything just automatically clicked? You start off as strangers, which turns into friendship, and eventually it turns into love. 

But what happens when that person lives thousands of miles away? What happens when things don't go according to plan.. and you lose the person you love most... and there's nothing you can do about it.

It is such a horrible feeling losing the one person you love, especially when you have no control over the situation.

I know what you're thinking.

"How can she love someone she's never met?"

I have a question for those people.

How can you underestimate long distance relationships? I fell in love with Joseph's soul, his entire  being before I could even feel the warmth of his skin. If that isn't true love, then please tell me what it is. 

I fell in love with the little laugh he did after I said something silly.

I fell in love with his voice. It became my favorite sound.

I fell in love with his mind; how he viewed the world and everything in it.

He was my flower...

At first our connection was much like a small seed needed to grow the flower.

We were just two strangers getting to know each other.

Then I began to nourish the seed, and it only grew from there..

Soon we were talking from the time we both woke up, to the time we both went to sleep.

All the goodmorning/ goodnight texts were wonderful..

However, nothing compared to the sound of his voice. instantly, I developed strong feelings. I was so intoxicated by it... soon it became my drug.

Then we video chatted... and my feelings only grew stronger.

Every detail of his face was burned into my mind... From his emerald green eyes... to his olive complexion.. down to the way his lips curled when he spoke.

That seed flourished into a beautiful flower.

"I love you."

Those three words are so powerful yet so deadly. 

My flower was so beautiful... so vibrant and full of life.

Joseph and I were unable to speak to each other for a month... and the only way I thought to fix it was to end things.

Biggest mistake of my life...

A storm took place in my heart. Every day was just so dark and my heart felt so heavy..

I told myself it was time to pick the flower.

As I reached for the stem, I felt a warmth in my hand. It was my own blood.

Thorns grew all over the stem of the flower. Each thorn represented a memory with Joseph...

There is no way I could pick the flower... So it remains untouched.. still as beautiful as ever.

The only difference is that it is no longer my flower...