Dear soulmate, who forgot me.

Chapter 1

Dear Jason,
On February 19, 2015. Just a few months away from our outdoor wedding at a farm not so far from the suburbs, the worst thing that could happen to anyone, happened to me.
We live in Indiana, the weather isn't totally on our side most of the time, and you know that. It's your last year at Purdue University in Indiana. You want to be a veterinarian. You love animals deeply, and I'm so glad you remember that.
You woke up late that morning because you worked an overnight shift at your moms bakery. You got into your black 2007 Chevrolet Tahoe. It was snowing, the road was paved with it. Underneath the snow, was ice. It had rained last night before it started snowing. It was horrible conditions to drive. I remember because I didn't go to my class at Indiana University, my dad told me to stay in until the roads are clean. You drove anyway. You drove, you turned on your 4 by 4 on your precious SUV. You were on that street where there's a Goodwill and a McDonald's. I don't drive by there anymore because it's a reminder of what that road took from me.
The driver in the small vehicle, was drunk. The small car kept swerving, but you were so determined to go to school, you figured it was because of the snow. The man in the small car, tried to stop, but because of the snow, because you were driving past 40 mph, couldn't. You swerved your vehicle to the right side of the road, to prevent a scratch on that dumb SUV. The small car hit your drivers side, and you hit a pole, slamming not only the front of your truck, but your side as well. You were unconscious for a while, until you got to the hospital. I was still at home when I got that wrecking call, from your mother. "Honey, please try to remain calm, Jason is in the hospital, he is on his way in an ambulance. I'm on my way there." I couldn't keep calm, and you know that. Your mom was only pretending to be calm, she was driving severely slow because she was afraid that she'd crash right then and there. The snow was still bad, I didn't change my pjs, I ran outside, disregarding my dads orders of staying in until the snow was gone. I drove my Ford Focus, with my youngest sister Ana sitting next to me on the passengers side. I was in shock, she'd tell me later. I didn't know it at the time, all I could do was drive carefully, and get there to see you. To see your handsome face, and your cheekbones rise up every time you'd talk. And your full lips line up in a beautiful smile. And your blue eyes to land on my green ones. I wasn't prepared for the worst.

When I got to the hospital, your mom was in the ICU unit waiting room. She was crying, her eyes red. She was pale. She looked so scared, fear in her eyes was so real. I sat next to her, and held her in my arms, just like you would if you had been there. I didn't cry, yet. My sister Ana just stared at me. I didn't talk, I couldn't. I don't remember how long we were there. It felt like forever. Ana says it was two hours.

Then, a tall doctor, with navy blue scrubs on, walked out of the ICU doors and says, "Jason Ovard?" He questions. Your mom and I stand up, at the same time. He walks towards us. "Jason is now stable. He has a fractured arm. He took multiple blows to his head. Which caused traumatic amnesia."
I wanted to cry, but I didn't. Your mom did, a lot. She cried on my shoulder, on the black north face jacket I still had on.
"Can we see him?" I finally spoke. The doctor nodded, and he lead us to your room.
We got to your room. Your hand was wrapped already, you had scratches from your windshield all over your face. The top of your head was covered, that thing covered your beautiful blonde curls. You weren't awake. I walked towards you, and that's when I started crying. I let it all out. I pulled the chair next to your bed and I reached for your right hand, and held it. I was crying so much, so hard. My nose hurt. Ana later told me that my cheeks were almost purple. But here I was crying. I was thankful to God that you were alive, and with the exception of your hand breaking, you were okay. I just wanted you to wake up. To open your ocean blue eyes and say, "stop crying you'll ruin my hospital gown." You always had a sense of humor. And then you'd kiss my forehead because we don't like full on kisses in public. But that's not what happened.

When you finally opened your eyes, you looked scared, you let go of my hand quickly. Your eyes were filled with the fear that I was feeling earlier. You eyed me, like a person would if they were to pass a garbage can. Like if I were a stranger. I ignored it, I said, "you're awake!" I shook your mom up from her sleep in the chair next to me. "He's awake!" I said to her. You were still staring at me like if I were a stranger. But I didn't know that you'd forget me. Your forever, your best friend, your soulmate, your future wife.

Your mom woke up,and looked at you and smiled widely. She stood up, and walked over to your bed and hugged you. You hugged her back. I thought that was weird because you let go of my hand. And honestly Jason, I thought it was one of your jokes. You're a class clown, and I love that. You made me laugh all the time.

Once your hug with your mom was over, you turned to look at me and said, "mom who is she."

Your mom and I exchanged looks. Yes, I had heard the doctor that you had traumatic amnesia. But I couldn't believe it.

"Jason I swear if you're playing I'm going to kill you!" I stated. Jason, you're one to joke at a funeral.

But you didn't laugh. You just eyed me. "What..?" You turned to look at your mom. Like a scared child. This wasn't the Jason I know and love.

"Mom who is she?" You said, as you attempted to sit up on the bed, but your arm was in a cast.

Your mom looked up at me, and looked as confused as I did. The machine you were hooked on, started beeping. And I was scared. And so were you. Once you told me, that you were scared of never making something out of yourself. But then, I realized that I was scarier than that.

I stood there, once again in shock. The nurses and the doctor who had brought us to you, came in. I couldn't see, but you had fainted. And all I did was cry. Once your vitals were brought back to normal, the doctor turned to me.

"What happened?" He asked. I was crying, I was going to sound so ugly when I'd answer. Your mom said, "he doesn't recognize Isabel." She said, her voice cracked as she said that. She was crying too.

The doctor had a nonchalant tone. And said, "with traumatic amnesia, the amnesia will be temporary. Sometimes people forget events, or even people. However, I will say this, how long it last usually depends on how severe the head injury is. I will do more exams on Mr.Ovard. But for now, it is for his health that I ask you to leave."  He said, and gave me a semi smile.

I nodded, and walked out of the room. I turned back one last time. You were there on the bed, with more cables being tampered on you. I walked out and into my car. Ana had been picked up by my dad, we had been here all day basically.

So I got in my car, and cried. The car was extremely cold. But I didn't care, the hurt in my heart was greater than the cold January air.

How could you forget me? How could you forget the many adventures that we had throughout the 3 years that we've been together. How could you forget how much I love you. How could you.

I cried until my face was numb because of how cold it was. I was such a horrible person in that moment, that I wanted to drive home super fast so that something horrible can happen to me. You didn't remember me, so what's the point.

I turned on my car. That's when I replayed the doctors words, it may be temporary. So I'll wait, just like you waited for me one year when I went to study abroad in the U.K.

I decided that I would write you letters, beginning to how this accident happened, and telling you how we met. It'll be like the story of us.

I love you, Jason Michael Ovard. My best friend, my soulmate. Even if you don't remember me. I will make you remember with these letters.