When I go to write, everything that was running though my head, every beautiful word just escapes me.
I go to write out what I feel for you to make you understand that I am not lying when I say I love you.
I am not lying when I say I will wait for you because I will. When you come back, I will be here with open arms for you to come back to; if you'd have me.
I will tell you I love you over and over again as many times as you ask me to.
I miss your touch. I miss the way you'd hold me in bed, at the movies, and even in the car when we would just sit there in the backseat at Thompson.
You may have been someone my parents would not approve of, but they don't know you like I do.
I am not perfect. I will screw up and do something wrong while you are away. We are not together but I know that it will hurt you so I will try my best to meet your standards; to be my very best.
Do you understand what this distance does to me? Do you understand how much it hurts me when I go a day or even an hour without hearing from you? I stay up late to make up for the five hour time difference.
I did try to move on. I tried a few times. I even resorted to clouding my throughts with drugs and alcohol. That obviously did not work since here I am still missing you.
I do not want you to become a stranger to me. I do not want to become a stranger to you. I want you to be mine and me to be yours.
Can you come home soon, please? I know you love it there but I love you here. You made me feel beautiful and special.
Now that I think about it, you kind of treated me like shit. You would stop talking to me after we slept together and after we have a good day together in general.
I trusted you not to break my heart. I did not even want to feel this way towards you, hell I did not want to feel like this at all towards anyone.
Yeah my grammer and punctuation sucks but I do not care. I just want you to understand what I am trying to say.
I stare at the ceiling when I am feeling alone. Maybe I deserve this pain. Call it karma.
When we first started talking back in December, you asked me if I believed if things were meant to happen or something along those lines. I said it depends. I soon relized that I was meant to meet you because you became everything to me. A week or two later I asked you if you believed in true love, you said maybe. I know you do not feel that way towards me but I will always come back to you. After our fights I came back and so did you. I can be myself with you which is a huge comfort because I hate pretending. I hate hiding behind this mask.
We are not the perfect pair but I do not care. No one is perfect. Whenever I see your name pop up on my screen, I immediately smile because I am glad I lived another day to talk to someone as sweet as you. I am done pretending. You are what I want and I will not take anyone else no matter how many people tell me the other guy is better. You are the right choice. I will love you for as long as my heart can take it.
Come home and make me feel less alone. I miss you and I love you dearly.
