The Best Horror Story Ever - a goofy Jeff the Killer story

Louise is minding her own business, taking care of her daily chores. Every day she is told she has to feed and water the avians of her parents' petting zoo. They have chickens, quail, guineas, turkeys, ducks and geese. Today she got home late from her dad's house and had to do this in the dark. As she is halfway through, Louise sighs and takes a break from pulling her little green wagon full of bird feed to watch a rooster chase after another.

Suddenly she feels uneasy, as if someone is watching her (cliche). She looks around to see no one. Then, as she turns back to her wagon, she sees Jeff the Killer lunging toward her (Dun dun dunnnnn) . Fortunately she's really clumsy and trips over her wagon, just barely ducking his attack. She quickly gets back to her feet and runs, zig-zagging around the chicken houses.

Louise grabs a random piece of PVC pipe and swings it toward his head, but he just grabs it and breaks it.

"Seriously?" he chuckles. Then immediately he's after her again. They run around the pins for quite some time until they are both getting exhausted.

"Hey," she pants, "You wanna take a break and get some ice cream?"

At first he just gawks at her, but then he just shrugs and says, "Sure." So they call a temporary truce and walk down to (insert favorite ice cream shop here) for some ice cream. Then the chase is on again.

Jeff nearly catches her when suddenly a chicken runs under his feet and trips him; he falls right into what looks like mud. Louise hears the noise and looks back, still running. She laughs at him just before she runs right into the trunk of a tree. A bit dazed, she looks up to see a large shadow wash over her and the trunk. She spins around, expecting to see Jeff, and sees a duck.

The duck is just like any other duck, except that it is sixteen feet tall with daggers protruding from its beak that glint in the moonlight.

"What the f-" but she's cut off as the duck swallows Louise and Jeff whole.

The End

Discussion Questions

How many pickled peppers did Peter Piper pick?

If your mom says that your dad's always wrong and your dad says that your mom's always right, then who was phone?