The flames were ablaze, reaching almost 20 feet high and lighting every face in the sea of people. Today would mark the day as Nys'thaar's ceremonial and a permanent place among the people of Desmônd.
The pathway in front of me was lit up by red hot stones, each with a sigil of protection so nothing could ruin or prevent this sacred night. The drums near the fire began to hum, and I took my first steps of pride forward.
I was terrified, excited, eager, and distant. Words I had been told earlier rang in my ear; "Is this what you really want? To be a slave of protection til the day you die?"
Shame filled my heart and I swatted away all the emotions that came with those words. I love my people, and I would do anything to protect them.
Five more steps forward.
"Haven't you thought about Jeanne?" My steps had stopped and my heart almost did. Her piercing blue eyes, tender touch, and loving words wrapped around me, as if holding me in place.
Ahead of me at the bonfire, I could see many confused faces. Ajax, my mentor, extended his wooden cane and shook as he stood.
"What is the matter? Is something wrong?" he asked.
I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing would come out. Guilt spread throughout my body like a disease and I suddenly couldn't meet Ajax's gaze. Closing my eyes and blocking out all of the noise, the chatter, the crackles of the fire, Ajax's relentless questions, I let myself decide what my heart wanted.
Soft, brown hair between my fingers. Her lips as gentle as a newborns touch. A laugh as melodic as an angel's harp. Love so pure, I couldn't imagine not being without it.
"I cant," I found myself whispering.
"What?" Ajax's face looked mournful. Taking a full, I repeated my words in a louder manner.
"I can't."
Before he had a chance to speak again, I turned around and fled the ritual area. My gaze never strayed from the path, careful not to meet the eyes of thousands of people that I was supposed to protect. People I'd known for more than 10 years.
"Nys'thaar!" they called, even small children's voice. Teared welded in my eyes, but nothing could change my mind. I ran until I was at Desmônd home tree, and stepped through back to the human dimension.
I could already imagine my fingers intertwined with hers.
